Yes, I remember. I remember what it was like to be with you. I remember what it was like when you smiled. I remember it all. Remember when we hugged for the first time? It's OK if you don't, that was a long time ago. I remember all the little things you said, but it's OK if you don't. You ask me if I remember, I remember.
I remember the pain of the heartbreak you gave me after you left, the bitterness that settled over me; and the farther you ran, the farther I ran from the people who mattered the most in my life. Everything comes and goes, but I didn't think you would be one of those things.
I lost the most important people in my life, do you remember that? As close as I was to my family I was getting closer to yours and I loved every second of it. I lost the people who cared, the people who waited up for me to see if I made it home, and I lost the courage to talk to people the same way I used to.
I was mad, I was so mad when you left. I remember you driving away that night and not looking back and in that one moment you made me feel like the most worthless person to you. I saw you drive by, right in front of me, you almost hit me with your car. I was so filled with anger that I couldn't explain; you aren't supposed to be angry at the people you love.
I was mad you said "I love you," that very first time. The darkness all around us, it weighed a million pounds on my chest. Looking back it was one of the best nights we had, but that night broke my heart. I was mad the words came off your lips as nice as they did, the sound of you saying it took my breath away. I was mad I knew that things were going to stop being as good as they were in the first months of our relationship.
I remember the lonely nights after you left, the void you put in my life. We went from talking every day to hardly talking at all. You ask me if I remember and I hate to say that I can. There was a time that I wasn't afraid to text you, talk to you, and smile with you, but after you left I lost that too.
I used to wish it was just a bad dream, that everything after our break-up was some bad dream I was living in. I tried to forget about you, but as the days grew longer, I knew that I couldn't run from you. I remember you, oh yes, I remember and I always will remember you.
I can be without you for six months, a year, five years and could master not thinking about you, but no matter how much time passes there will always be that moment where I see a photo of you or catch a little of your cologne on a crowded street and suddenly I am plagued with a rapidly sinking stomach and the relentless question: What did I do wrong?
