There are certain standards and societal norms that men face everyday. One of the most idiotic and harmful of these is the stigma of showing or being emotional. Boys are taught from a young age to be strong and tough. We fall or get hurt and are immediately told that it's wrong. "Quit your crying. Big boys don't cry". This philosophy is carried on through parents, teachers, and most harmful of all, other boys. It is instilled so rigidly and so early in a boy's life that it can be difficult to change.
Somehow sensitivity in men has become synonymous with weakness. This couldn't be any farther from the truth. Expressing heartfelt emotion or crying in front of guys brings on a lot of negative reactions. It is not uncommon to hear males call someone rude names or make derogatory remarks to a man who dares to break this "rule". It is these types of occurrences that keep this convention in place. By no means is this true of every man, but there are far too many guys out there who bash on their peers for showing the slightest bit of emotion.
Having emotions is human. Why do we have to pretend that we don't have feelings other than toughness and strength? There is nothing tough about bottling up thoughts and feelings. It takes true courage to be open and honest with people, and even more so to convey these feelings in front of or to other guys. Pretending to be fine and "strong" at all times isn't healthy, and simply isn't true.
There is no shame in being emotionally expressive. I am the staunchest supporter of this. Anything remotely sad or heartfelt will make me cry, and I don't even try to hold it back anymore. If I had a dollar for every time one of my roommates came out while I was crying from something on TV then I wouldn't need to worry about rent. Real men cry.
This applies to how guys talk to each other, as well. Far too often boys avoid saying anything nice or heartfelt sentiments because of ignorant friends or family who call emotional expression "gay". It is 2015, this needs to stop. It is for this reason that many guys feel the need to follow up anything emotional with the phrase "no homo". It is truly pathetic that this is the reality of interacting with other dudes.
It is time we start behaving with one another in a different way. This machismo attitude needs to come to an end. I am so frustrated with the responses I get from saying exactly how I feel to other guys. I know that I am not alone on this subject. There needs to be a change in how we teach our young boys. Be sensitive, be heartfelt, be open, but most importantly, be you. Stop stifling your thoughts and feelings. Just let it all out, fellas.
