Elle Woods is an icon and a beacon of light in this cruel, cruel world. We need her words of wisdom to keep us going.
*Blasts "Legally Blonde the Musical" soundtrack as I write this*
1. Warner: "You got into Harvard Law?" Elle: "What? Like, it's hard?"
A classic. Leave it to Elle to be so nonchalant over getting into HARVARD. I strive to be as classy as she is. A true queen.
2. "I feel comfortable using legal jargon in everyday life. (catcalls) I object!" -- Elle
Me, coming up for air from writing a case brief.
3. "Paulette, I taught Bruiser to shop online, I think I can handle congress." -- Elle
Give me this confidence. Also.... how?
Maybe you should switch your focus to Animal Behavior because, wow.
4. "Do you think she woke up one morning and said: I think I'll go to law school today?" -- Professor Callahan
I mean, yes. But like, so did I. I feel so personally attacked.
5. "Elle, we came to see your trial and look! There’s like a judge and everything… and jury people." -- Serena
Me, anytime I observe actual court.
6. "I once had to judge a tighty-whitey contest for Lambda Kappa Pi. Trust me, I can handle anything. -- Elle
Yes queen. Don't worry, law doesn't even compare to judging a tighty-whitey contest.
7. "If I’m going to be a partner in a law firm by the time I’m 30, I’m going to need a boyfriend who’s not such a bonehead.” -- Elle
You remember she said this in rebuttal to Warner's: "Elle, if I'm gonna be a senator by the time I'm 30, I need to marry a Jackie, not a Marilyn."
TAKE THAT WARNER. You actual piece of poop. You left little miss Elle Woods in the dust and then came crawling back to her when she showed. you. up. Boy, bye.
8. "Except when I dress up as a frigid bitch, I try not to look so constipated." -- Elle
Gotta love a little girl drama. And after all the shade Vivian threw, I was so happy Elle snuck this backhanded comment so nonchalantly in there. It just shows you can be tolerant of crap but still demand respect-- which is a constant reminder that we all need to be like Elle.
9. "If you're going to let one stupid prick ruin your life, you're not the girl I thought you were." -- Professor Stromwell
Peep Professor McGonagall-- I mean Professor Stromwell. There's going to be jerks all throughout your life and your career. Don't let them make you feel like less of a woman-- or less of a person-- for being your true, authentic self.
10. "You must always have faith in people. And most importantly, you must always have faith in yourself." -- Elle
Cue the tears.
Thank you, Elle. For helping me realize my worth-- not just as a woman in a male-dominated industry-- but as a person who deserves respect, and who can do anything she sets her mind to.
Reese Witherspoon, please reprise your roll in Legally Blonde 3 so Elle can keep showing women just how incredible they are. And because I selfishly want to see another Legally Blonde movie in my lifetime.
See ya in 2020, Elle!