We will all experience loss and devastation at one point in our lives - some more than others.
In the past two years, I have lost four family members, all but months apart. In 2016, I lost my Great Aunt to cancer and then weeks later I lost my Great Grandmother. Losing both of them was difficult on everyone, because they are from the same side of the family, mother and daughter.
After learning how to cope with the loss of them both, I lost my pet to old age. When he passed away, it was like the already cracked brick wall completely gave out down on my life. I felt trapped, completely enveloped by the pain I knew I would never learn to cope with. Night after night, I would cry over the loss of my best friend with nothing but the memories I have of him to help with the awful pain. All summer was nothing but a time of grief and mourning.
Six months later, we lost the man everybody knew and loved.
On December 7th, 2017, I lost my Grandfather. We all knew the day was going to come, but none of us could bring ourselves to fathom the unavoidable imminent pain this loss would cause us. This man has been the poster child for living. He came from little, had dreams and aspirations, served our country in World War 2, loved with all of the love in his heart, lived in the city I can only dream of inhabiting, created a beautiful family, worked his ass off day in and day out, was only able to come home a couple times a month to see his ten children and beloved wife, and lived to 92 years old. He is and will continue to be the strongest man in my life, but now he takes the title of strongest man in Heaven.
Along with his passing came the feelings of devastation I felt only weeks before, causing me to feel as if I had gone back to square one. Losing somebody you love is never easy, but with the help of friends and family it becomes a little easier.
Not only have I learned things about myself, but I learned who really has my back in times like these.
In times of loss, it doesn't take much to differentiate between who your friends are that care a little bit and who your friends are that will calm you down when it all becomes too much. I have been able to do exactly that.
I have also been blessed with the ability to calm myself down when I get overwhelmed over these tough times. When I feel like just giving up and telling myself that nothing really matters, whether that happens to be school, extracurricular activities or even keeping up with my friends, I remember how I was before I lost these beautiful people. I tell myself that even though they're gone, it doesn't mean I should stop. I will still be able to feel their presence and receive signs from them whether they are through rainbows, time or a certain song. They never really leave, especially when you are mourning.
This article is for my family members who believe it is too hard to keep going or to try anymore. He is never really gone, we all know how stubborn he was and how he never would leave someone who was down. He is not ready to take his place yet, and God is okay with that. When he does take his seat, we have each other; we have family.
