We have all been there: feeling exploited by a coworker, boss, family member, friend, or a lover who has treated us so unfair. It is often easy to blame others and convince yourself that you did no wrong. But, if you take a step back and look, you realize that there is one attribute in each situation, and it is you.
We let people in easily and allow them to treat us in any way. The way you transact with people has a lot to do with your attitude and the way you carry yourself. We know people that seem to have everything together in their life, but in reality, they settle for less and accept whatever is dealt for them. Everyone, at least once in his or her life, has settled for less simply because it's what's easiest, but we also think that's all we deserve. This is true especially in relationships; people have a habit of dating douche bags because it is what they are used to and they don't know how to leave.
When we take a step back in our everyday lives and think about our self-worth, we realize that some people will be lifetime friends, social friends, or acquaintances. But, we learn to appreciate the several different types of values that each friend brings in our life. Depending on if the value is good or bad, we return it with the same energy they give us. God blesses us with awesome friends, but only a few of them are who you have selected because we really took a step back to think about ourselves.
We tolerate people who don't appreciate us, use us, don't value our hearts, and disrespect us. We've allowed people to not treat us what we are actually worth. We make excuses for their behavior toward us and play a game of push and pull with people who clearly don't value us at all. This is our self-esteem and sense of worth in a fairy tale dream which isn't real life. When we come to the realization, that fairy tale dream in the end is crushed. It hurts us and eats at our self-esteem.
It takes years and years for people to get over the "fairy tale" ending. Those years call for heart tramples, tummy aches, heart aches, and unhealthy worrying. But, it also takes years for us to wake up and realize that the very most important relationship is the one with ourselves.
Once we realize that the most important relationship is with ourselves, we embrace self-love. This leads to better relationships with coworkers, bosses, family members, friends, or even a lover. We fall in love with how perfect the way God made us. We will continue to grow, work on bad habits, and stop apologizing for who we are; flaws are what make us beautiful humans.
So...
Draw people to you because you're the best YOU. Know your value. Your body is a temple. Your heart is a precious gift. Be very selective. Love yourself and be loved. Respect yourself, and be respected. If you don't respect or love yourself FIRST, then trying to start a relationship with another person will crash and burn. You deserve to be treated the way that you treat others and the other way around, as well. Change for yourself and mirror friends because it will help you grow. Always remember that if they judge you, they aren't your fit.
"It's not selfish to love yourself, and to make your happiness a priority. It's necessary." - Mandy Hale
