Take a deep breath. Go on, actually do it. In for 10, out for 10. It is OK if you take some time for yourself, whether that is singing your heart out to your favorite songs in your car, or watching as many episodes of "Grey’s" or "One Tree Hill," or simply taking an eight-minute nap because that is all you can fit in. There have been many times that I set a timer for four minutes because that is the only time I had during the entire week for a nap. I know what it’s like to fill my schedule with class, meetings, coffee dates, extracurricular responsibilities, work, maybe getting to eat once throughout the day and anything else that finds its way into my planner. If you are like me, your planner is your lifeline, and you cannot go anywhere nor do anything without it. You most likely have your life planned out by the hour. Group projects are the worst because you have such limited time to meet with your group, so it turns into a Google Doc that you can work on at 2 a.m. when you finally get around to starting homework.
I sometimes get so caught up in all of my responsibilities that I have a hard time responding to people when they ask, “What do you do for fun?”
My responses: “Well, I hang out with friends sometimes.” “I sometimes get to watch a couple episodes on Netflix.” “I made it to class on time every day this week!”
We are told that college is a very crucial time. You are somehow supposed to join every group you possibly can, get on the exec board for at least one of them, always go to class and get decent grades, volunteer, work, build your resume, work out, sleep often, call your family members, but also make time for yourself and enjoy being young and let loose often. How are we supposed to do all of these things and more when there are only 24 hours in one day? I hate when “adults,” a.k.a. the people out of college, tell me to slow down. I wish it were that simple. Really. But slowing down means to give up one of the things that I love that I need to graduate or will help me get a job — none of which I am willing to let go of.
1. Pick and choose.
See what is the most important to you. Write down all of the activities that pull you in different directions and see if there is anything your heart isn’t into or you don’t necessarily need right now.
2. It is OK to say no.
When people learn how responsible you are, they will begin to lean on you for their needs as well. Explain that you have just enough on your plate, but cannot handle anything else at this time. Being honest with them and yourself will help the overall situation.
3. It is OK to ask for help.
I have a hard time with this. But we all have supporters. Sometimes they are friends at a distance, so you can call them and complain about everything, and they can distract you from what is your present. Sometimes they are friends who are equally as busy and can share your pain. These are usually the friends making Dunkin’ Donuts runs after 11 p.m. with you because you know you all need it. Sometimes they are friends and/or family members that encourage you and ask if they can help. If it is running an errand, helping do your laundry, grabbing you food or coffee, ask for help. These gestures that these people are willing to do eliminate responsibilities off of your chest and help you feel better.
4. It is OK to cry.
“I don’t have time to cry.” Yes, you do. Release those emotions, and just let it happen. Normally, you cry for 30 seconds, pick yourself up and go onto the next responsibility. The crying fest helps you relieve that frustration and stress from always being on the go.
5. It is OK to reevaluate and start over.
Take an extra semester to take some classes about topics that you are interested in and would maybe like to change your major to. Sometimes it is good to do some things for yourself instead of all for your future.
6. Lean on friends and family because you’ll find your strength through them.
I’ve learned that emotionally I will hold everything in until one of my loved ones makes me actually open up about everything going on. Let your family and friends help you feel better and encourage you so you do not get burnt out.
7. Make time for your friends.
Whether it is running to the store with you, studying quietly at the library, actually finding time to go out, going to a comedy show, getting coffee or some food to eat, make time for them and appreciate what quality time you do get with them.
8. Spend the money.
Go out to eat or to the movies or to the bars or to get a pedicure. You work hard; reward yourself every once in a while. It is OK to let loose and enjoy yourself every once in a while.
9. Get on good terms with your professors, advisors, leaders and supervisors.
This way if you need an extension or some leeway with an assignment, they might be more willing to help you out. They also can be great references for later on in life, and they are able to actually talk about your work ethic from personal experience.
10. Enjoy life!
Make sure you do things you actually enjoy. College is all about making fun memories, and it gives you a reason to use the excuse of being a college student. Make mistakes, live life and make memories. Have fun!
Life is tough, especially when you are the girl who cannot say no. You’re a hard worker, and you are doing your best. I see your grind and respect it. Make sure to take some time for yourself every once in a while, even if you have to schedule it into your planner first. Go get some coffee, your favorite food, your best friend and go do something fun, just for you. Because you deserve it.
