For an eternity, people have said that wanting something is not enough — you need a physical hunger to accomplish a goal. Some goals are a test of wit or strength, and some are just tests of patience. Seeing "The Late Show with Stephen Colbert" is definitely the second.
I have been a Stephen Colbert fan for a very long time. As soon as he started hosting "The Late Show," I knew I had to see him in person. What I did not know was that I would spend most of the day standing in a line in the cold with about 400 other people. If you have a desire to see the show sometime this winter, here is what you are in for.
I left for the city at about 12:30 p.m. by train. The train was delayed about 10 minutes because, well, New Jersey's transit sucks. Whenever I take a train anywhere, there is always some weird unexplained delay. Since the train is local and makes a bunch of ridiculously close stops, I arrived at Penn Station at about 1:30 p.m.
What I did next (and what you should do if you want to get to the Ed Sullivan Theater the fastest) was take the subway (the E train, to be more precise). After you leave the subway, you will be across the street from theater.
I arrived at the theater about 20 minutes before lining up began, and I was still around the 232nd person in line. This next part I cannot stress enough: if you are going in the winter, wear layers. The city is very windy, and you will probably be standing outside for at least an hour (most likely longer). So, dress appropriately or else you will regret it.
When they finally start to pass out tickets, make sure you have your driver's license on you, because you need to be carded before they can give your ticket. They will then give you a CBS stamp on your hand: do not wash it off. The people in charge will then give you a number telling you where to stand in line. At that point, you will have about an hour to get lunch.
If you're not in the city every day like me, then you really don't have a lot of time to ponder where to eat. If you do, well then, you're set, but if you don't, I recommend Rosie O'Gradey's. It's warm, clean, tasty and most importantly, close to the theater.
At 3:45 p.m., you will head back and line up by section according to the number on your ticket. You will wait in this line for about an hour and a half before going through security that rivals airport security.
There is a bomb-sniffing dog, a metal detector and very unfriendly looking guards who will ask you to empty your pockets of everything into a basket, which you are allowed to take after you have been scanned. You will then wait in another line where a woman will tell you cannot have your phone on in the theater or leave to go to the bathroom during filming.
You will finally be in your seat at around 5:05 p.m., when Mr. Colbert's opening act (most likely a comedian and a band) will entertain you for about 30 minutes before the studio starts filming.
By this point in time, I was pretty tired but was still able to enjoy myself. I guess another reason to call it "The Late Show" is because by the time everything done, it feels like it's one in the morning.
All in all, the show itself is fantastic, but the waiting—not so much.
