Briefly go back to elementary school in you mind. You're enjoying lunch when a small group of kids comes over and calls you "four eyes" because you're wearing glasses. It's very cliché, I'm aware, but just go with it. Naturally this hurts your feelings: it's not your fault you have to wear glasses. You express your upset feelings, whether it be with a frown or tears, and they immediately hit you with the phrase "take a joke."
The phrase "take a joke" is one we've all been hearing since elementary school. And it holds the same problems now as it did then. It's always been a way to get away with saying hurtful, insensitive things without facing real consequences. People say it to try and absolve themselves of any guilt they may be feeling for hurting another person. They put the blame on the victim of this supposed "joke" by accusing them of being overly sensitive instead of acknowledging the fact that they themselves have done something wrong.
I've been seeing a lot of content around the internet recently centered around the idea that people these days are "too sensitive" and can't "take a joke." And it's not just elementary schoolers saying it. Over and over again I've heard it used by adults as well, and honestly it just makes them look like the children from elementary school that I would expect to hear it from. Adults use this phrase in more impactful and harmful ways than a child making fun of another glasses. Adults are using it to make fun of major and very serious issues, such as mental illnesses, sexuality and race. Half the time what I hear people say aren't even really jokes, they're just ignorant and insensitive statements that people try and excuse by claiming "it's just a joke."
It's synonymous with the phrase "no offense but..." in that they're both used to pardon whatever offensive ideas someone feels the need to state. For example, "No offense, but if you're Asian shouldn't you be good at math?" By adding "no offense" to that sentence does not in any way take away from the insulting statement that followed. Just like saying "You're not truly Asian because you're not good at math" isn't any less insulting by adding "just kidding" at the end.
People complain that our society is too sensitive these days because people can't "take a joke." First of all, so what if we're sensitive? It just shows that our society is becoming more aware of how our words and actions can affect the feelings of others and that's something we need to be mindful of anyways if we're going to live in a world that respects one another. Secondly, if you can't tell a joke that doesn't put people down, you're not a very funny person; you're just unoriginal.
