College is a time for falling in and out of love on the daily. Just like every princess knows, you have to kiss a few frogs before you find your prince. Unfortunately, they all seem to have a weird standout quality that separates them from the others. Here are a few examples of what you say to your friends after kissing these frogs:
The Rock Climber
“He just gets me.”
“Nature is this foreign concept to me, but he makes it seem so simple.”
“He. Lives. In. A. Tent.”
“We both had to unvelcro our Teva’s to go to sleep. It was magical.”
“He makes me drink craft beer and I guess he is just opening my world to new things.”
“I guess I have to end things because there is no way on God’s earth I will be climbing to the top of any cliff for any guy.”
The Foreign Athlete
“Apparently he’s really good.”
“I mean he has to be good, he’s from another country, right?”
“He was a French guy… I had to know how good they were to have a kiss named after them.”
“I know at one point he said something about the Olympics…”
The Reject Athlete
“You guys told me he started!”
"Wait…he’s from this state?”
“Oh God, does anyone know him?”
“Will this get back to my hometown.”
“He transferred back to here, so obviously he wasn’t good enough to go anywhere else.”
“He makes his own fan club shirts… great.”
“Let’s just not talk about this.”
The Ex
“He really has changed this time.”
“I know I say that every time, but this one is different.”
“He knows everything about me, so I can skip that awkward small talk phase.”
“Do not act like you wouldn’t go back to your ex.”
“There are a lot of factors that came into play - mainly the alcohol.”
Your Best Friend’s Boyfriend’s Best Friend
“You never told me his friend would be so cute.”
“I have only myself and his Patagonia vest to blame.”
“Subtly tell him I want him to come back over… Don’t make it obvious!”
“Wait. What if we go on double dates? It’s best friends and best friends.”
The Frat Bro
“I should have known it was a bad idea when he ran across the street with a case of Natural Light over his head.”
“His brothers called him by his last name and it was an awesome last name.”
“Did I just say ‘his brothers?' Great.”
“He only owns Vineyard Vines shirts…”
The Guy you Met on Tinder
“Never again.”
“I understand you guys wanted a funny story but did no one seriously think I was in danger?”
“He left his phone…”
“We are mailing this. I refuse to run into him again.”
“You know, he was a great kisser, but I’m seriously concerned if he thinks by kissing we are now married.”
Your Neighbor
“Well… this is going to get awkward.”
“Eh, I probably won’t go outside for a few days.”
“Why go out to eat when we can order takeout and then we won’t run the risk of running into him?”
“Oh you made out with the other one? Thank God!”
The Celebrity Look A Like
“Dude, did you see his hair?”
“Was I the only one wondering if he stepped out of American Horror Story?”
“I didn’t even bring it up, he did.”
“I almost called him the wrong name.”
Your Co-Worker
“Why?”
“I now have to quit my job. Great.”
“I can’t quit. He will have to.”
“Great, no one is quitting.”
