In lieu of April being Sexual Assault Awareness Month, I believe it is incredibly important to have an open conversation about the threat of sexual violence and harassment on college campuses. According to the National Sexual Violence Resource Center, 2/3 of ALL college students have been sexually harassed on their campus and 90% of those sexually assaulted will not report it. These statistics are extremely alarming. Through my own personal experience, I know how difficult it can be to speak out against something you know deep down is wrong. You are afraid of the ridicule and what may happen if you do speak out.
This letter is for you.
First and foremost, I want to let you know that you are not alone! Many people are in the same situation as you and you do not need to fight this battle alone. I know it is a difficult mountain to climb, but you do not need to struggle by yourself. There are several hotlines you can call and get the help you wholeheartedly deserve. You have people who care about you and want the best for you. Speaking out against any type of violence, whether domestic, dating, or sexual can help you immensely. The healing process began for me when I spoke out against violence and advocated for those who feel like they may not have a voice. Help is always there when you seek it.
Never blame yourself for what has happened to you. No matter what someone may tell you, it is in no way your fault. It is not because of the clothes you wear, your attitude, whether you were in a relationship, or were intoxicated; anything done to you without your consent is WRONG. Do not fall into the trap of overthinking that if you did something differently it may have never happened. It is always, 110%, your attacker’s fault. In a society where “victim-blaming” is prevalent, like in the case of Ke$ha, it may seem like speaking out might only make things worse. But it is our responsibility to stop this way of thinking in its tracks. We need your help to stand up and say that you will not continue this awful cycle.
I held myself back from speaking out about my own experience in the beginning because I was afraid of being labeled a victim. I was afraid that whenever anyone would see me they would only see a victim, as someone broken. That is not me and that is definitely NOT you! It took some time and support to help me realize that what I have gone through has changed me into the strong person I am today. You are a survivor! Embrace that part of you, that you were able to overcome something that might have demolished others. Being a victim is not the major part of your identity; having the courage to get help, the strength to speak out, and the willingness to help others is what makes you who you are. Now is the time for us to rally around each other and spread awareness that sexual violence can happen anywhere and to anyone.
We are all here for you.