It is MY Choice as a Woman
Start writing a post
Relationships

It is MY Choice as a Woman

Instead of placing judgement on me, please worry about your own life, your own goals and enjoy your life instead of putting down mine.

46
It is MY Choice as a Woman
Pinterest

In my last article, I talked about finding your S.O at unexpected times of our lives. To me, this subject relates to marriage in a close proximity. If you are thinking the same as me, then awesome. This subject is having a family. And my S.O and I have decided not to have children.


Many people will tell you that "it's your marriage and you do what you feel is the right choice", but they don't always seem to mean that. Every time I get on the subject, I just say that I am not interested in having a family besides my furbabies with my fiance. Call me selfish, call me whatever you want, but it will still not change the decision we have made. We are happy with our selves and don't need to add anymore people to the mix. Why can't I just enjoy my nieces and nephews by spoiling them, loving them, playing with them and spending time with them? I don't see me having children just because the undocumented laws of marriage tell us to do so. I love the little ones in my life. I love children, I really do but it is my right as a woman to not get pregnant. So here are a few reasons of my decision:

1. We have our own goals.

Being considered an adult (by age only of course), I see many of my classmates are married, have several kids and are happy. I am truly happy for them be able to share their smiles with their adorable babies. But again, having kids was never on my radar. Personally, I don't see myself as being in the role of a mother. Seeing my friends and family have kids, I just don't see the point in taking on another full-time job, spending about on average $1 million. We are happy with having our jobs, saving money and working towards our goal of travelling and being with the ones we love.


2. Too many kids without their family.

Being me, I could change my mind. If i wanted a child badly enough, I would adopt the children that many people didn't want or the parents were unfit. Instead of giving the world a mini-me monster, I would love to be able to show a child that someone didn't want, that the human race is not a total disappointment like humans can be. He/she doesn't deserve to be in dozens of foster homes with people who don't always care enough. Granted we would be nervous as hell, but why add to the world when you can love children that already exist. (yes, I am being contradictory, but like I said, I do like kids).


3. So much to see, so much to do.

I want to see the world still. I didn't give myself the chance when I was young because I was so concerned about saving money that I didn't always take advantage of adventures outside of my little bubble. The same went for college, because I was so focused on graduating, and getting the best possible grades that I didn't allow myself to relax and enjoy trips I could have take. Having kids would only put a hold on that for the both of us. We have our own dreams to achieve. Call me selfish, but it is what it is.


4. Being tied down.

Come at me internet, but that is how I feel. I see so many children so misbehaved even with good parents. Kids are so influenced by their peers and other outsiders. Instead of trying to be a moral supporter constantly for a kid who honestly could care less, I would rather have my jobs, volunteer at local animal shelters and just do my best for my fiance and I. I am already tied down with thousands of dollars in loans, having rent, credit cards, and now a car loan. Then add a child, with hospital bills, a mortgage, baby food, clothes, and all the other child essentials. Our savings would have nothing in them to even support that child, let alone us as parents.


5. Resentment

I have seen people who have roped their husbands, fiances or boyfriends into having kids just because that one person wanted kids. Sure at the time their partner is alright with it, but sometimes that partner resents the child and their partner because that person wanted a child. I feel that it is selfish on their part to not even discuss parenthood. Its just unfair to trap that person. Some moms only have kids for the sole fact of receiving money from the child's father and could care less about the child. I would never dream of putting a child in that twisted situation like my friend's and family have dealt with. I wouldn't want that for my child, for my fiance, or me.


If you want children, kudos to you! Children deserve love and guidance. But I would rather be the aunt who enjoys spoiling her nieces and nephews, as well as my friend's children. I am happy with my life and where it is going. So instead of placing judgement on me, please worry about your own life, your own goals and enjoy your life instead of putting down mine.


Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
the beatles
Wikipedia Commons

For as long as I can remember, I have been listening to The Beatles. Every year, my mom would appropriately blast “Birthday” on anyone’s birthday. I knew all of the words to “Back In The U.S.S.R” by the time I was 5 (Even though I had no idea what or where the U.S.S.R was). I grew up with John, Paul, George, and Ringo instead Justin, JC, Joey, Chris and Lance (I had to google N*SYNC to remember their names). The highlight of my short life was Paul McCartney in concert twice. I’m not someone to “fangirl” but those days I fangirled hard. The music of The Beatles has gotten me through everything. Their songs have brought me more joy, peace, and comfort. I can listen to them in any situation and find what I need. Here are the best lyrics from The Beatles for every and any occasion.

Keep Reading...Show less
Being Invisible The Best Super Power

The best superpower ever? Being invisible of course. Imagine just being able to go from seen to unseen on a dime. Who wouldn't want to have the opportunity to be invisible? Superman and Batman have nothing on being invisible with their superhero abilities. Here are some things that you could do while being invisible, because being invisible can benefit your social life too.

Keep Reading...Show less
Featured

19 Lessons I'll Never Forget from Growing Up In a Small Town

There have been many lessons learned.

51720
houses under green sky
Photo by Alev Takil on Unsplash

Small towns certainly have their pros and cons. Many people who grow up in small towns find themselves counting the days until they get to escape their roots and plant new ones in bigger, "better" places. And that's fine. I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought those same thoughts before too. We all have, but they say it's important to remember where you came from. When I think about where I come from, I can't help having an overwhelming feeling of gratitude for my roots. Being from a small town has taught me so many important lessons that I will carry with me for the rest of my life.

Keep Reading...Show less
​a woman sitting at a table having a coffee
nappy.co

I can't say "thank you" enough to express how grateful I am for you coming into my life. You have made such a huge impact on my life. I would not be the person I am today without you and I know that you will keep inspiring me to become an even better version of myself.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

123060
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments