When I started college I learned the hard way that I was brought up with a pretty sheltered mindset. I never had to make many decisions in my entire life. Not for myself nor anyone else. It was by far my biggest hindrance to my personal success, as I openly gave myself to my surroundings, cared deeply about attention from others and formulated ways to relate to just about everyone and everything by attempting to assimilate into a textbook toxic environment. What resulted was people unintentionally taking advantage of the fact I didn’t know what I was exactly looking for. This time in my life I managed to terribly damage my outlook on myself as well as my relationships with others.

Fast forward to today: I have learned many lessons in the past two years that I have been in college, but the biggest lesson I learned is that not being able to make a decision innately becomes a disservice to yourself as well as a disservice to those around you. Someone once said to me, “indecision is a decision,” and it forever changed how I viewed any problem I would face. Pushing and pulling yourself in a hundred different directions just leaves you empty, confused and lost. So if there is one thing I have learned it is this: find a rope, a line, a story, anything that will pull yourself out of the bullshit that is life, it doesn’t even need to be true, just as long as you believe it strongly enough that you know you have a start and finish line because conviction goes hand in hand with direction and you owe at least that much to yourself.

How about the people around you? You might say, as long as I’m not hurting anyone I’m good right? No I’m sorry dude, you are wrong. No matter what the relationship is like, the truth is you hold accountability for your end. From the minute you were born, you interact with everything that surrounds you. We are part of an ecosystem based off of interaction and when you play your part and everyone else plays theirs the ecosystem thrives. If you don’t know what part you play and attempt to play someone else’s role you are missing out on your opportunity to play an essential responsibility and everything around you surely will crumble, you have my word. In the real word, interactions are made with friends, family, coworkers, even strangers. In the business world, without conviction you will be swallowed and spit out because you are going to be swung in every direction that someone decides to call you. Don’t be a prison bitch, fight for yourself or you will die out. The business world as well as the rest of the world thrives on innovation, change, etc., but so many people choose to swim comfortably in the shallow end. By dissolving into your surroundings you are not contributing anything positive because of the fear you have of producing something negative. But isn’t it better than producing nothing at all? At least you have something to learn from. Let me introduce you to awareness. Awareness is defined as an understanding and knowledge of the world around you. How are you supposed to know the water is cold if you don’t even dive in? Who do you think you are? Knowledge IS power.

I’m not asking for you to figure out yourself or your conviction today or even tomorrow. All I am asking is for you to make yourself vulnerable enough to try and test out your ecosystem because yes, some days you will open your hands and rain, hail, and lightning will strike your very palms and you will be left with blisters and scars, but once in while you will get the sun, and it will provide you with all the comfort and luxury you have ever wanted. It all starts with making the decision to open your fist.