"Many are the plans in a man's heart, but it is the Lord's purpose that prevails"
Proverbs 19:21
Anger. Bitterness. Resentment. Grief. Sorrow. These are just a few of the awful emotions that were pumping through my blood when God decided He was just going to spin my life in a totally different direction than what I had planned.
Once you turn 18, you gain many new and exciting privileges. You can now get a tattoo, buy a lottery ticket, vote, lease an apartment or house, donate blood, go clubbing, skydive, bungee jump, change your name, open a bank account, sue someone, participate in jury duty, get married, buy fireworks, join the military, buy a car, gamble, and tons of other ridiculous things you can finally do without having to ask mom. Personally, I pierced my nose and called it a day. You’re officially an adult and can make your own decisions now. You have complete control and ownership over your life, right?
Wrong. News flash people. God doesn’t care if you’re 18 or 81. His plan for your life is the one you’re gonna live by whether you like it or not. And at the time that I discovered this “plan” I so did not like it…
“This is just a step in the journey to finding yourself,” “It has to get worse before it gets better,” “It’s all part of God’s plan,” “I’m so excited to see where this takes you” are all words that I was told a million times over and I did not believe or want to hear. On the flip side, I also heard, “You ruined your life,” “I thought you had it all together,” “You really messed up this time,” and my personal favorite, “Why would you put yourself through this?” And to all of the people who asked me the second set of questions, I don’t blame you. I was asking myself the same thing.
So why was my life flipped utterly upside-down? God needed my attention and He wanted it pronto. And believe you me, He got it. But the attention He got from me was nothing but hatred and annoyance and irritation. He had stripped me of everything I held close and left me turning in circles desperately searching for a way out of a terrible nightmare that was my reality. You see, sometimes we get so caught up in worldly things and ideas and concepts, that the only way to refocus our attention on what’s truly important is to take away all of the distractions. I was so wrapped up in my own little world, a world that didn’t have time for God. A world that didn’t need God or so I thought. A world that lived by its own rules and regs and made its own decisions.
Y’all I had it all planned out. The college, the roommate, the job, the wedding, the boy, the kids, the house, the dog, the friends, the car, all the way down to the very last detail. I had my entire life planned out to a “T” and it was absolutely perfect. In my mind, at least… God, however, thought quite differently. So when all of these beautiful plans came crashing down, I had no one else to blame but God because I sure as heck didn’t ask for it. Little did I know, He knew exactly what He was doing by crushing all of the dreams I had conjured in my head. Making room for His own.
J.K. Rowling once said, “Rock bottom became the solid foundation on which I rebuilt my life.” These words resonate with me as I look back and see all of the progress I’ve made since I hit my own rock bottom. Being in that place wasn’t fun or something I asked for, but it was necessary and forced me to look to God because I had no other choice. And when I looked to Him, I began to see the pathway He has in place for my life. I started seeing opportunities and new beginnings around every corner. And now I understand that my Father truly knows what is best for me even when I’m oblivious to it. I know that He will do anything and everything in His power to lead me down the amazing road He has set before me. And although I had no say in it, this is the road I am meant to travel and I wouldn’t have it any other way.
God loved me enough to yank me out of the life I was living and show me the life I’m meant to live through Him. He loved me enough to break my heart full of worldly things and hold my hand as I rebuilt it with His grace. And through that grace I have been redeemed.
Look back at your life from last year at this time. What’s changed? Are you where you imagined you would be? I’m sure not. I would have never in a million years seen myself where I am now, but I wouldn’t trade it for the world. I am where I’m meant to be.
Thankfulness. Love. Gratitude. Appreciation. Adoration. These are some of the beautiful things that fill my heart on this day. I cannot be more appreciative for a God who knows me far better than I know myself. For a God who knows what’s best for me. For a God who is willing to hurt my feelings to keep me on the good and righteous path that He has set before me. For a God who loves me when I most certainly do not deserve it.
So, dear friends, I encourage you all to seek God’s path for your life. Just know that God’s love will always find a way and no matter the circumstances, His most perfect plan for your future will prevail. Go live in that promise.
