Being An Introvert In An Extroverted World

Being An Introvert In An Extroverted World

Introverts often have to adapt to extroverted conditions
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I am an introvert. I tend to be quiet around people I don't know, I enjoy spending time alone, and I get drained after interacting with people for long periods of time. However, I don't really have a problem talking to people I don't know, I enjoy being a leader, and I am in two majors that heavily rely on interacting with others. Introverts are stereotyped as having no friends, being totally antisocial, and being weird. Extroverts, on the other hand, are celebrated; they are the go-getters, the leaders, the life-of-the-party.

Introversion is frowned upon and seen as a bad thing in our culture, while extroversion is sought after. Our society is geared towards extroverts. Social norms involve doing group-oriented things and being a social, outgoing person. While having a night in for Netflix is glorified, it is seen as a temporary break from social activities instead of something that happens regularly. Being quieter or doing things alone is seen as weird by some people.

Recently, I came across this article by The Atlantic about schools overlooking introverts. After reading the article, I found it very relatable; we are often pushed to participate in our classes, with many having points based on how many times you speak in class. This is meant to spur discussion but can be dreaded for introverts. I personally do not have a problem speaking in front of others; some days, I may not have anything I want to contribute to class and may rather soak information in silently and on my own.

Reading about how schools are extrovert-oriented made me think about how society is extrovert-oriented. Introverts often have to adapt to extroverted conditions, both in school and the world. It's not always a bad thing; I've grown much better at being outgoing when needed and look forward to having a career that involves working closely with others. But why should we have to change our underlying personalities? Why should we have to completely change and adapt to fit what is seen as the "norm?"

Being an introvert in an extroverted world requires a lot of energy. Sometimes I have to push myself to be outgoing and work with others. Sometimes I wish that society could accommodate introverts more and respect the strengths that we have rather than mainly focusing on our weaknesses and encouraging us to change.

Great leaders can be introverts. Introverts can accomplish great things and be in a social field of work. Introverts can do anything an extrovert can but just may have different preferences. Rather than looking to go out with a group of friends to end a busy day, I prefer to stay in and be alone. I thrive on the energy of being alone, and alone time at night is necessary to power me through the next day.

Maybe one day, society will become more accommodating and be accepting of introverted qualities. But, for now, us introverts will continue to live an extroverted world and power on.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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Things To Know Before Dating A Firefighter

You'll learn how to tell the difference between different kinds of sirens.
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There are just certain things you are going to want to know before dating a fireman. In my experience, I had to learn along the way. But at the end of all the calls, constantly smelling his gear in the car and sometimes even cancelled plans, I sure do love my firefighter!

SEE ALSO: 10 Reasons To Date A Country Boy

You were promised a list, so here it is:

1. If they are even within 20 minutes of the station, they will always leave you to go on a call.

No matter the circumstances, if you have a fireman on your hands, he will jet to the car and be on his way.

SEE ALSO: What It's Like To Date A Police Officer

2. Meeting nights are not something you try and fight with them about. They are going to leave and you do not have to like it because it wasn't up to you anyway.

I have learned that these nights are not optional. Yes, other people miss them, but not my firefighter.

3. No matter where you are or what you're doing the minute they hear a firetrucks horn, they're looking for it and hoping they're not missing anything good.

You will learn the lingo. Structures, fully involved (the good stuff) smoke alarms, cat in a tree (ehh I mean they are fireman...soooo still good stuff).

4. They know the exact difference between an ambulance, cop, and, of course, a fire truck siren.

Which means that you will have to learn, too.

5. You’ll have to accept that when he has to do hall rental cleanup, you're going with to help.

You fold the chairs and he stacks them. And Im talking at like 12 a.m.,1 a.m.

6. When you come around the firehouse, there will be jokes made and they'll mess with him about you or even you about him.

Honestly it's a giant bromance going on and they prey on this kinda stuff.

7. At first, you won't really have a name to the fire guys. Until you're around long enough.

You'll just be Boyfriend's name's girlfriend.

8. The fire pager goes where he goes.

Next to the bed, in the car, next to your bed, your living room, EVERYWHERE. And even if it's not the real pager, it's the dog app that I can never remember the name of so dog app it is. (Say that really fast to get the full effect).

9. They will probably wear their station shirt/apparel at least 4-5 days a week.

AT LEAST.

10. If you've got a good one, you're always put first. The list will always go "You, the firehouse, me, everyone else."

But secretly they always want to put the firehouse first.

11. You will learn and know more stations, trucks, members, and chiefs than you will ever want to admit.

Unbelievably true.

12. When you're driving and you see a fire station, you'll have to look at it.

If its an amazing building, you'll have to remember the name. And then you'll have to tell him about it. And then you've just proved number 11 correct. Add it to your list.

13. Never make plans while he's on a call. You can never know when he'll be back.

Even if the calls are short, they could stay at least another hour washing the trucks and being boys, of course.

14. In case you didn't understand the severity of the first one, if you are on the phone and you hear the pager go off in the background, just tell him you love him and hang up.

Because if you don't, he will. "Got a call, Love you, bye." Mid-sentence is always what you want to hear.

15. You'll never want to watch "Ladder 49" again.

You will cry like a baby and then want to make him quit.

16. Outside of the stations, fireman tend to forget that fire isn't a toy and it's pretty damn hot.

*Playing with the lighter fluid or burning things on the stove*
"No it's alright, I'm a firefighter."

17. You will start your own station shirt collection.

From NYFD memorial shirts, a station from where you're vacationing even acquired old shirts of his, you will have started your own pile of station shirts.

18. You can't get angry or upset when he is unavailable because he's going to go to the firehouse for the fifth time that week, or if there's another fire prevention thing to do.

You can't be mad because he's doing what he loves and also because a man in a uniform isn't too shabby.

There are a lot more things to know before dating a fireman, but the rest you'll just have to learn along the way.

SEE ALSO: 5 Things To Know Before Dating Someone With Anxiety

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Please, If You're Somehow Still Using The 'R Word'— Leave That Habit In 2018

Come on guys, its 2018. Google a new word.

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Maybe it was because I witnessed two boys get in trouble in elementary school for using this word as an insult. Maybe it's because I fell in love with a thing called Camp Able. Maybe it's because one of my best friends is a special ed major. Or maybe it's because I try to be a decent human being. I do not use the R word.

Until this past semester, I hadn't really heard anyone use it often despite one encounter in 6th grade. Most of my best friends I have met while serving at places like Camp Able or Camp Bratton Green where summers are dedicated to people with diverse-abilities. I think having been surrounded with like minded people for so long made me forget that some people still use it as an expression. Let me tell you, it's annoying.

The word itself has been brushed off even in a "scientific" sense. It means to be slowed down, but it has stretched far beyond that meaning and has turned into an insult. It's an insult of comparison. Like any word, the power behind it is given by the user and most times, the user uses it demean another person. It's like when you hear someone say "that's gay". Like, what? Why is that term being used in a derogatory sense? Why is someone's sexuality an insult? Hearing someone use the R word physically makes me cringe and tense up. It makes me wonder what truly goes on in someone's mind. People will argue back that it's "just a word" and to "chill out", but if it was just a word, why not use something else? There is a whole world full of vocabulary waiting to be used and you're using something that offends a whole community. Just because you don't care, it does not mean it shouldn't matter. Just use a different word and avoid hurting a person's feeling, it really is just that simple. There is not a good enough reason to use it.

I volunteer at two summer camps: Camp Bratton Green and Camp Able. If you know me, I talk nonstop about the two. More realistically, if you know me, it's probably because I met you through one of the two. Even before I was introduced to the love at Camp Able, I still knew that this was a word not to use and it never crossed my mind to think of it. The history behind the r-word goes back to describe people with diversabilities but because of the quick slang pick up it was sort of demoted from the psychology world. Comparing someone or something that is negative to a word that you could easily avoid speaks volumes about who you are as a person. The word is a word, but it is subjective in its meaning and in its background.

Just stop using it.

A List of Objective Words/Phrases to Use:

Fool/Foolish

Blockhead

Nincompoop

Silly

Ludicrous

Dim-witted

Trivial

Naive

"A few beads short on the rosary"

"On crack or something"

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