The start of the semester brings lots of firsts, and along with those fresh starts also comes a lot of excitement. As a science major, the one aspect that brings the most anticipation for the start of the semester is beginning lab work. Just the thought of designing, executing, and evaluating your very own experiment at the collegiate level is invigorating; we aren't in high school anymore, so this is going to be great. And sometimes, the realization that this isn't high school anymore can be intimidating and frustrating. The expectations you imagined for your first biology lab in college most likely will not be identical to the reality of this experience. But, really, what is? At the end of 18 weeks, you have actually learned more than you ever thought could be possible-not only in terms of science, but also in life lessons. Here are 17 hilarious, yet totally relatable, scenarios for science lab expectations versus realities.
1. Expectation: I can't wait to perform intricate experiments and discover something groundbreaking!
Reality: We are growing algae? In a mason jar? Really, that's our experiment?
2. Expectation: The lab report is written as a group. That's good, so we can divide up the work and not be overwhelmed at all.
Reality: Nobody in the group seems to care that this lab report is worth 75% of our final course grade, and I end up writing majority of it.
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3. Expectation: Finally, I will be surrounded by other people that geek out about science, just like I do!
Reality: Everybody in my lab group that originally was a science major is actually no longer a science major only after two weeks.
Reality: Everybody in my lab group that originally was a science major is actually no longer a science major only after two weeks.4. Expectation: We get to design our own experiment with no limitations, as long as the experiment fits the theme of the semester announced by the professor. It's time to let our imaginations run wild!
Reality: Okay, so we have to figure out how to design an experiment that not only fits the theme of the semester, but also fits the very, very, very tiny budget that we have been allocated. Oh, and we also need to be sure that our experiment actually tests something relevant that will provide enough subsistence to write a paper about.
5. Expectation: The first experimental design will work out.
Reality: We just restarted our experiment for the third time, so our lab group is now officially three weeks behind in data collection.
6. Expectation: Our hypothesis will be correct.
Reality: Our hypothesis is nowhere near what is actually happening, but that is perfectly fine.
7. Expectation: Lab is only scheduled for three hours every Thursday. That's not a lot of time.
Reality: You end up staying over the three hour scheduled time every Thursday. Also, you come in at least once a day for data collection and to be sure that this round of the experiment has not failed yet.
8. Expectation: This isn't high school anymore. Woo-hoo!
Reality: This really isn't high school anymore.
9. Expectation: Why do we need a TA? This will be a piece of cake.
Reality: Your TA is your saving grace as she is the one who has guided the group through the ups and downs of the semester. Plus, she knows your experiment (along with the other four in the class) better than the students that are performing them.
10. Expectation: Thinking to yourself (and sometimes out loud) that your experiment isn't even a real experiment. How are you supposed to draw conclusions from something that is so problematic?
Reality: Your experiment showed significant results...that means your dependent variable was actually affected, in some way, by the introduction of the independent variable.
11. Expectation: We are going to be taught exactly what to do and how to use each piece of equipment that we will need.
Reality: We are handed a heavy microscope and a teeny tiny glass slide that costs $400 and told, "You break it, you buy it."
Move slowly, people.
12. Expectation: Everyone in the lab group will cooperate and rise above and beyond their individual minimal requirement.
Reality: Each day, somebody else is upset for a some new, secretive reason that probably has nothing to do with biology, yet still impacts the lab group negatively. It can be difficult to ignore the irrelevant pettiness, but someone has to in order to keep the group together. Other than your sanity, keep it together in the name of science.
13. Expectation: Great, a poster presentation will be at the end of the semester. I love making posters.
Reality: What the heck am I supposed to put on this giant trifold? Might as well just slap the entire lab report on here.
14. Expectation: Nobody is actually going to take the time to ask our lab group questions at this poster presentation where in depth answers would be necessary, so there's nothing to be nervous about.
14. Expectation: Nobody is actually going to take the time to ask our lab group questions at this poster presentation where in depth answers would be necessary, so there's nothing to be nervous about.Reality: The head of the biology department spent a good 25 minutes asking questions and making comments to our group, so that was a fun time. Oh, and did I mention that he studies exactly what our experiment was based on?
15. Expectation: I am never going to see the people from this lab group again.
16. Expectation: You are doubtful as to how much you are actually going to learn in an intro to biology course.
