What It's Like Inside The Mind Of A Procrastinator | The Odyssey Online
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Health and Wellness

What It's Like Inside The Mind Of A Procrastinator

I want to be productive... I promise

Shayley Swanson
Jan 29, 2018
Texas A&M University
174
What It's Like Inside The Mind Of A Procrastinator
Photo by Benjamin Combs on Unsplash

I'll do it tomorrow.

I will finally get out of bed excited for the day...

But I'll do it tomorrow.

I have so much stuff to do today...

But I'll do it tomorrow.

It's not really that important anyway...

So I'll do it tomorrow.

I'll apply for that job...

Tomorrow

I'll finally start my assignment...

Tomorrow

I could even have a deadline for something due... And I will still choose to do it...

Tomorrow.

Teachers don't understand why I don't turn in assignments...It's not that I didn't WANT to. I just couldn't. People don't understand why I wait to do things or why I don't do what I need to do.

That is the lovely oxymoron in this mess. Its not that I don't want to wake up early, or get stuff done, it's that I can't.

I just can't.

And then people say

"Yes you can, you just have to push yourself to want to"

EXACTLY!! I don't WANT to... I can't make myself want to... Even though I know I need to. trust me I know I need to. But I can't make myself want to.

"Why?"

Great question. Probably because I don't see a purpose in doing it. Or I know that if I do apply for that job its the same cycle over and over again. Or if I go on a date with that person, the same thing happens.

Or to answer why... I don't know.

But that's what gets me the most is when people then say, well its mind over matter. You just have to will yourself to do it. And I totally agree. And I try. I try to want to care. I try to want to get things done for myself and for others because I WANT to WANT to do it, Its the fact I don't WANT to.

"That doesn't make sense to me"

Let me put it this way. I WANT to WANT to do things today. I truly do. That is not a lie. And you know what I may even have those days where I do exactly what I told myself I would do and you say

"See that wasn't so hard"

But what you have no idea about its the strength and mental power it took to will myself to do that. I am having to fight my own mind to do things that I want to do. When you have depression it is YOU vs your MIND. And sometimes YOU win, but most of the time the mind wins. Because think of how exhausting it is arguing with someone... then picture trying to argue with your mind. And the mind is a powerful thing.

Still not making sense? Well if you have never dealt with feeling this way then it will never make sense.

But I'll figure it out for you...

tomorrow.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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