I learned that proving my point isn't worth causing a fight. Being the bigger person is better in the end. There is no reason to work myself up over such little, meaningless things that won't matter in a couple of hours from the time it's happening. I have little control over people's actions. I cannot take things personally.

It was late August. I was only a couple of weeks away from starting college. I had a ton on my mind. I was losing sleep because of the stress of starting school. I was desperately looking for a job. Once I found one, I had to figure out how to balance work, school, and my social life. I was becoming a mess.

I had a friend named Rob, who I met through school. He works at a frozen yogurt store in Freehold. I wanted to see if he could do me a favor and get me a job there. I asked him one weekend if he could talk to his manager. He said, "Of course I'll tell them a good word for you. Just fill out an application online as well so they have all your information."

I was pretty excited. I wasn't showing it right at that moment but on the inside I was telling myself, "Finally I can get a job, get some money, do something productive during the day, and hang out with Rob. It'll be a good time all us working there and seeing our friends that come in the store." It seemed so great in my head.

Monday came by, and I saw Dean's girlfriend Gabrielle at school. I told her I applied to the yogurt shop. I was telling her how it seemed pretty cool, the idea of Rob and me working there and hanging out. She then cut me off and said she heard that I won't get the job. I was confused. I said "What do you mean I didn't get the job? There's an open spot to fill." Gabrielle then told me Rob's manager had received my application and asked Rob about me. Rob then said, "Don't hire him. He has half a brain."

Once I heard this from Gabrielle, I was pissed. I called him up and asked him about it, only for him to start stuttering in a lie and deny it. I starting yelling at him and said some really messed up things to him. I couldn't believe he would actually screw me over like that. I asked myself throughout the day as I sat in class," What benefit does he get from doing this? Why couldn't he be a nice person and help me out?" His actions showed what type of person he was.

The day I said all those nasty things to him wasn't going to be the last I was ever seen him. He still went over Dean's house all the time. I could tell it was a very tense confrontation for him. I could see in his face that it was very awkward and unpleasant for him whenever he saw me. I had no problem seeing him, as I knew I did nothing wrong. He knew he messed up and regretted what he had done. I wasn't trying to get payback. I was just looking for an answer. Why? I thought we were friends. Friends don't do that to each other.

Rob thought I was looking for revenge, or I was out to get him. He started acting like a little girl instead of the twenty-one-year-old he is. Rob then began to tell Cierra's mom the things I told him to make me look like the bad guy and get me in trouble. Teams had started to form. It became me, Gabrielle, and Dean against Cierra, Rob and Dean's mother. This was when I knew it was getting way out of hand. There was nothing good to come if this continued.

This was the very last thing I wanted to happen. At this point I didn't even care about being screwed out of a job. All I cared about was peace being restored within the family. This could have all been avoided if Rob would have admitted he lied in the beginning. Yes, it wouldn't change the fact and get me a job, but that was okay. I sure knew it would save us a lot of fighting in that moment.

This caused a problem where I had to step up and say, "My friendship and respect for Dean's family is more important than proving my point to an immature ass. "I later that night, I apologized to Rob, to clear up everything so it was a more "comfortable environment" for everyone. It took a lot of swallowing my pride and looking ahead to see the bigger picture to make this all happen. Even after the apology, Rob believed he did nothing wrong. I knew I had done something right. At the end of the night, I realized it wasn't what others thought. It's what I believed that mattered most.

It felt good being the bigger man. I see the bigger picture in things and value peace for everyone's sake. Rob barely comes around anymore .He is mostly busy with work until late in the night, or out busy with Cierra. I see it as a winning scenario, Dean and I no longer have to see him. The best way to look at it at the end of the day is that it wasn't the last job in the world. There's no sense in working myself up and doing something stupid that I can't redeem myself from based off of Rob's immature actions.