A little over a month ago, I was in New York City for the first time in my life. There's nothing quite like it. Prices are outrageous, the buildings are taller than you can comprehend and cab drivers really do drive like they do on the TV shows. But there's something about the city that's just a little bit magical. I've lived within an hour of Chicago my whole life, so I've been downtown plenty of times. Maybe I'll get some flak for saying this, but Chicago's got nothing on NYC. When you stop and think about everyone in the arts and entertainment industry who has passed through New York, everything that's happened right where you're standing, all of that history can feel a bit overwhelming, but in the best way possible.
During this whirlwind trip, I hung out in Times Square, saw the Statue of Liberty, visited the 9/11 memorial, saw my first Broadway show (and met Christian Borle and almost died), and sang on the Carnegie Hall stage...it was all so surreal and yet, at the same time, so natural and real.
I could see a future for myself there. I saw the future I always knew deep down that I wanted but was too afraid to admit to the world. I could see myself in the cramped but cute Manhattan studio apartment and taking the subway and wearing scarves and about 10 layers of clothes in the winter because it's always colder in New York and waiting tables to pay my bills because I'll struggle at first while I try to pursue my crazy musical dreams. There. I finally said it. I have big, crazy dreams of living in New York City and making a living as a performer. I’ve had those dreams for as long as I can remember, but they were just that. Dreams. It's easy to push mere fantasies aside, but once you actually get a taste of what it would feel like...it's hard to keep pretending you don't want it.
So, I'm finally accepting that it's OK to dream really, really big. I'm not packing my bags today or anything. It's going to take awhile, maybe a long time, and it's certainly going to take some painfully hard work. But it'll all be worth it when I end up back in the city that never sleeps. The city of dreams. The greatest city in the world.
