I was in a communications class before I took a medical leave from school. But last Wednesday on March 22, 2017, an ambulance picked me up from my dorm and took me to the hospital. My roommate came with me, and all I could think about is dying without seeing my sisters or parents. That day I was supposed to be in class peer reviewing the outline I had written for my speech. My speech was about transferring from one school to the next and what I learned in that process. Today, March 28, 2017, I was discharged from the hospital, and if I had been given the chance to make a speech this is what I would say:
On the days that I couldn't speak, you were there for me. You worried about me going into the hospital because you were a good friend. It didn't matter that we hadn't met personally — Odyssey brought us together and that is truly what mattered. You would call me to talk about anything on my walks from work back to school or vice versa. We could talk about boys for hours; tattoos came up a lot, music, and work too. You had an Associate's Degree in Culinary Arts from Johnson & Wales University. You were getting your Bachelor's Degree in Business from Johnson & Wales University online. The entire week that I sat in the hospital, scared that another coughing attack would collapse my lung, you worried, you prayed, and you loved me.
Today, I left the hospital, happy to go home and get some much-needed rest. You had taken the children that you nannied to school. You loved kids — all kids. On your way to wherever you were going afterward, you swerved into an oncoming traffic circle where you had a head-on collision with a trash truck. I was sleeping in a car.
When I woke up, a mutual friend of ours had posted about your accident. I immediately messaged her asking what had happened to you. She said you were gone. My heart sank. I could stop crying, and the first thing I did was pray that you are in God's hands.
It's hard to stop crying. I keep thinking about our conversations and plans to vacation together. I think about Facetiming with you and your dog or all the makeup tutorials that consumed our lives.
Two weeks ago, I would've talked about how it's okay to outgrow a place you would love forever, but today I want to say never take anyone or anything for granted because you never know when they're going to be gone.
In loving memory of Kayla Michelle McNamara, you are in my heart and in my mind forever and always.
