Two weeks ago, I discussed how long-distance relationships effect one’s decision making in college. I see truth in those words, but as I mentioned in that same article, there are two sides to the coin. Distance can be incredibly helpful to a relationship. A couple can make it to the other side of a stint apart as happier, more secure individuals. The work demanded by a long-distance relationship has paid off large dividends for myself and many others.
I believe that distance can make a relationship stronger, but it takes two fully committed individuals—there are no shortcuts. Trust will only last if both sides are invested. The biggest part of that investment is strong communication. By strong communication, I mean the dedication of both partners to spending some weekend nights on the phone and to keeping your partner up to speed with the minutiae of your life.
The workload of long-distance allows a couple to perfect their communication. The hours of phone conversations and thousands (millions?) of text messages allow partners to understand the nuances of how each one expresses thoughts and feelings. It becomes easier to recognize when someone has had a bad day or is acting differently. You learn the right things to say to cheer up your significant other because those words are basically the only mechanism available to make them feel better. Once you are able to read your partner across hundreds of miles, communication in person feels easy.
Improvements in communication directly correlate to improvements in a relationship as a whole. You trust each other more; you appreciate each other more; you understand each other more. I feel there are a lot of couples who would actually benefit from time away from one another. As your relationship gets stronger, so does the faith in what you are trying to do. You become happier and cannot wait to finally see that person even more.
Speaking of which, there is no feeling quite like seeing your significant other after months apart; it feels like some combination of Christmas and a birthday. The excitement begins the moment you find out what day you two will finally get to see each other, which can seem like years away, and builds as the weeks slowly pass. In the days leading up to the reunion, your thoughts are dominated by the prospect of seeing that one special person—the celebration can begin.
Then, it is finally here.
After so much time of feeling incomplete, you feel whole and secure again. At the moment of embrace, all the worries and doubts and heartache melt away. You are reassured that the effort is more than worth it. The levels of anticipation and happiness derived from this experience are some which are nearly impossible to beat. Long-distance facilitates these moments of pure bliss.
The happiness continues the entire time you get to see each other. An extended period of separation ensures you will not take the presence of your partner for granted. Small activities like running errands or watching a movie are no longer so small, as you get to do them with your person. Everything in life feels sort of like an adventure.
Also, I find it useful to think of time apart as motivation for self-improvement. You have enough time such that when you get to be with your partner again, you can show off your improved abilities or appearance or knowledge. If the changes are noticeable, it shows your partner that you are growing as a person and still seek to impress them.
I disagree with the notion that all long-distance relationships are toxic. As with any relationship, there can and will be negative aspects. However, if you dedicate yourself to long-distance and execute correctly, the reward is incomparable: a lifetime with the person you love. And I think that is worth any amount of phone calls.





















