We all know the items that we secretly snuggle with when we are sad, upset, anxious, nervous or really need a good cry. This may be anything from a baby blanket to a treasured stuffed animal. For me, it is my baby blanket, appropriately named “Blankey” and a stuffed bunny named “Rabbity.” Both of these items, I have had since the day I was born and are near and dear to my heart. These items are something that most people have and are commonly called comfort items.
Comfort items, also known as transitional items, is something that many young children use as a way to ease themselves off of their parents for support and begin to learn techniques to deal with things on their own. Beyond the scope of just being a children's toy, these items are also very important to the psychological growth of children.
These items have been proven to help children be more confident and outgoing in the things that they do. Psychologically, kids use these items to replace their parents once they are separated from their parents in a situation like going to daycare for the first time. They are there for when a kid (or adult) needs comforting, but does not have a parent or guardian to turn to in that moment. This enables children to learn coping skills for themselves that will help them later on in life.
Children who have these items taken away from them at a young age because they are “childish” tend to have a more anxious personality and may not be able to deal with tough situations by themselves. A prime example of this is my father. At the age of three, every time he put his baby blanket in the wash, she would cut a strip of it off and told him that it shrank in the wash. By the time he was four years old, he did not have a baby blanket anymore. This shows in his personality now because he tends to be more anxious and unable to work through tough situations in a rational way. He was unable to form ways of working through these situations because he was left high and dry without a transitional item from his parents.
Many times it becomes taboo to have these items past a certain age, say twelve years old. However, the fact of the matter is that many people, about 20% of adults, still have their childhood comfort items.
So bring out those comfort items! Don't be ashamed to have them front and center on your bed for when you need them. Truth be told, because you still have your comfort item, you are probably a stronger person who can deal with tough times because of it!
