Why I'm Young, Taken And Not Sorry About It
Start writing a post
popular

Why I'm Young, Taken And Not Sorry About It

A long-term relationship is not the end of my freedom.

6395
Why I'm Young, Taken And Not Sorry About It
Ashley Kinzel

I cannot even count how many times I've heard something along the lines of these two statements: “You're so young, why are you in a committed relationship?" or “Don't be tied down now, you're only in college, you don't know what love is." Why does the fact that I'm young somehow portray me as naïve in society's eyes and eliminate me from the approval of others regarding being in a long-term relationship?

I've been on the other end of the spectrum. I've always been quite a headstrong person, and I definitely did not ever see myself being in a long-term relationship in college, nonetheless a relationship with my high school sweetheart. I've always advocated for waiting until you're older and being able to "find yourself" first. But, when going to college, “letting go" just didn't feel right for me and nonetheless, I took the road less traveled by and stayed with my high school sweetheart, which has resulted in an amazing three-year relationship. Experiencing this for myself, I have learned a few things.

Just because I'm young, doesn't mean I don't know what love is, and being in a relationship is certainly not the end of my freedom. What irritates me the most is the people that hint, whether it is subtly or bluntly, that I'm wasting my time and hindering myself from “wonderful future opportunities." What's better than approaching and accomplishing goals head on with the person you love standing right along side you and sharing this experience with you? Nothing. Cheers to those who do it alone, but after having experienced the joy of tackling things with someone I love, I don't really miss doing it all alone anymore. Maybe we'll get married, maybe our relationship will run its course and we'll both go down different paths, but regardless of what happens, I would never ever regret “wasting my time" with my best friend and I will forever cherish all the experiences and accomplishments we've shared together, no matter what.

Here are some of the reasons why I wouldn't trade “my future opportunities being hindered" (and I will never believe this is true) for the world:

I have a best friend always.

He knows every single detail of my life. His family gatherings are my family gatherings and vice versa. I always have someone to gossip with and let my inner crazy out for a bit with. I have someone to share my goals and dreams with, and I have someone who will support me and help me get there. Having a best friend to fall back on for anything and everything, literally, is the most amazing and comforting feeling, especially during a time in my life that is anything but welcoming and steady.

I don't have to spend hours getting ready for a night out.

I mean, sometimes I do, because who doesn't like to feel pretty and get dressed up to go out every now and again? But, there's no need to stress about finding the perfect outfit or dressing to impress 24/7. Sweatpants and a t-shirt is the outfit we both often settle for over getting dressed up, and even though I think people should still keep in mind how presentable they look day by day, I find appreciation in not having to constantly prove myself or be the best dressed at a party. Having someone that makes you feel sexy even when your hair looks a little funny or greasy is necessary, that's all I'm saying.

I leave parties with the same person every time.

When it's all said and done, I know who I can go home with after parties, and I know I'll constantly be going home to him. There's something all too relieving about having someone you love waiting for you to come home and knowing that this is ceaseless is fantastic.

I can fend off the creepy boys.

All I have to do is drop the bomb, “Sorry, I have a boyfriend" and that creepy guy is on to the next lady at the party (at least, hopefully). I admit I've used this line a fair number of times to get myself out of awkward situations when someone just isn't getting the hint, and it's nice to not have to handcraft a sneaky excuse last minute or signal some friends to come pull me away. Ultimately, I don't feel as rude, and it's a get out of jail free card! Win-win.

He's grown with me:

Being in a long term relationship has not held me back. What a special kind of bond that is formed and shared with someone you "grow up" with. We've gone through so may significant life milestones together, and having someone who's encountered it all with you and that can relate to you on a more personal level is something to be grateful for. I am thankful for the opportunities we take advantage of in order to push and help each other accomplish our goals and realize our potential. Having your own continuous and reliable personal cheerleader in a time of so much change makes all the difference.


I can plan ahead.

...And it's so much fun! Speaking for myself, my boyfriend and I already have a pretty good idea of some goals and plans to take on after we both graduate college. Some people might not have any clue what they're going to do after college, which is totally OK, but having an idea of a fun future to look forward to with someone I love is just so exciting.

This isn't to say there's something wrong with casually dating in college. However, don't settle for those who won't stick around for longer than a few days or weeks. If you do get lucky enough to find someone you can see yourself possibly spending the rest of your life with at a young age, cherish it while you have it. Those of you who already have, you're not weird for wanting something real even when you're young, regardless of society's pre-conceived notions.

Like I said, maybe this long-term relationship won't result in a marriage and maybe we won't stay together forever. No matter what the future holds, I will forever be filled with gratitude for the years of my life that I've spent with someone I deeply and genuinely love and the end of the relationship does not, in no way shape or form, indicate a failure or waste of time and opportunities. I've been given the opportunity to grow along side with someone special, and it's absolutely beautiful.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Student Life

Waitlisted for a College Class? Here's What to Do!

Dealing with the inevitable realities of college life.

56382
college students waiting in a long line in the hallway
StableDiffusion

Course registration at college can be a big hassle and is almost never talked about. Classes you want to take fill up before you get a chance to register. You might change your mind about a class you want to take and must struggle to find another class to fit in the same time period. You also have to make sure no classes clash by time. Like I said, it's a big hassle.

This semester, I was waitlisted for two classes. Most people in this situation, especially first years, freak out because they don't know what to do. Here is what you should do when this happens.

Keep Reading...Show less
a man and a woman sitting on the beach in front of the sunset

Whether you met your new love interest online, through mutual friends, or another way entirely, you'll definitely want to know what you're getting into. I mean, really, what's the point in entering a relationship with someone if you don't know whether or not you're compatible on a very basic level?

Consider these 21 questions to ask in the talking stage when getting to know that new guy or girl you just started talking to:

Keep Reading...Show less
Lifestyle

Challah vs. Easter Bread: A Delicious Dilemma

Is there really such a difference in Challah bread or Easter Bread?

36303
loaves of challah and easter bread stacked up aside each other, an abundance of food in baskets
StableDiffusion

Ever since I could remember, it was a treat to receive Easter Bread made by my grandmother. We would only have it once a year and the wait was excruciating. Now that my grandmother has gotten older, she has stopped baking a lot of her recipes that require a lot of hand usage--her traditional Italian baking means no machines. So for the past few years, I have missed enjoying my Easter Bread.

Keep Reading...Show less
Adulting

Unlocking Lake People's Secrets: 15 Must-Knows!

There's no other place you'd rather be in the summer.

958219
Group of joyful friends sitting in a boat
Haley Harvey

The people that spend their summers at the lake are a unique group of people.

Whether you grew up going to the lake, have only recently started going, or have only been once or twice, you know it takes a certain kind of person to be a lake person. To the long-time lake people, the lake holds a special place in your heart, no matter how dirty the water may look.

Keep Reading...Show less
Student Life

Top 10 Reasons My School Rocks!

Why I Chose a Small School Over a Big University.

188215
man in black long sleeve shirt and black pants walking on white concrete pathway

I was asked so many times why I wanted to go to a small school when a big university is so much better. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure a big university is great but I absolutely love going to a small school. I know that I miss out on big sporting events and having people actually know where it is. I can't even count how many times I've been asked where it is and I know they won't know so I just say "somewhere in the middle of Wisconsin." But, I get to know most people at my school and I know my professors very well. Not to mention, being able to walk to the other side of campus in 5 minutes at a casual walking pace. I am so happy I made the decision to go to school where I did. I love my school and these are just a few reasons why.

Keep Reading...Show less

Subscribe to Our Newsletter

Facebook Comments