I'm Not A Yes-Man | The Odyssey Online
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Politics and Activism

I'm Not A Yes-Man

But sometimes I am...

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I'm Not A Yes-Man
Regen Stahl

I'm not typically a yes-man. I'm a strong and independent person. I can stand up for what I want and what I believe when I want or need to. But I'm not a confrontational person. I hate fights and arguments. I really hate debating and proving someone wrong just to prove them wrong.

This sometimes leads to internal conflict and added stress or anxiety on my part for various reasons. It's really difficult sometimes to bite my tongue and put someone in their place. People can say some really stupid and awful things, and maybe they don't mean them or maybe they just aren't informed on the topic, but things get said.

A lot of times, if someone says something I don't agree with or offends me, I don't usually get all worked up and blow up on them. That's not reasonable or acceptable. I tend to hold things in until it gets too late, which isn't really ideal either, but in my mind it's the best course of action.

Especially when it comes to my friends or someone I truly respect, I'll do anything it takes to avoid conflict.

Since this is the way I am and the way I handle things, I end up being someone that's taken advantage of quite often. People ask me for things or to do things that I don't exactly want to do or give up, but I like helping out and being someone that others can turn to.

I've recently realized that this sometimes makes me the yes-man of my group of friends or people I spend a lot of time with. I end up following along with whatever everyone else wants or is doing just because I'd rather spend time with them and make them happy.

I rarely put myself first, and it comes back to bite me in the bum more often that not. I've trained myself to think that the people around me deserve my time and energy more than I do.

Helping people is great and I love it, but sometimes it just isn't necessary. We're all capable of taking care of ourselves and handling things on our own, and I need to learn to let people do just that.

I need to learn to let go and only help when asked or needed. I need to learn to offer to only those who return the favor. I've spent so much time on people who either don't want or appreciate me, and it's just not OK anymore.

I'm finally doing things for me and doing things I really enjoy. I'm not doing certain things just because my friends do them or because I think it's the right thing to do. I'm doing it because it's what I want and what I think will benefit me in the long run. I'm having fun and spending time with new people doing new things, and it's really great.

So I want to let anyone who may be like me and might end up reading this to know a few things.

1. You're more important than you think you are.

2. It's OK to let go of something or someone because it or they have put too much stress on you.

3. Finding or doing the things you love is never a crime (unless you enjoy killing people or something, because that's a big no-no).

4. Trying new things, with or without your support group, is good and healthy and can open new doors for you.

5. As cliché as it is, and I've said this before, it's your life and you need to be in charge of it. Not your family, not your friends, not your advisers or anyone else you may look up to. Make your own decisions. You'll be OK.

Have the strength and the courage to be who you want and to do what you want. And if you ever need a little encouragement or a gentle shove in a certain direction, you can always come to me.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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