I'm In Love With Your Potential Not You

I'm In Love With Your Potential Not You

Who you are is who you are but it's not right for me.

To the boy I'm not in love with,

You know that music is what my life revolves around and it is one of my biggest influences. I came across another song a few weeks ago that resonated with me deeply. Shout out to Danielle Bradbery for the amazing writing. The beautiful song discussed acknowledging the realization of what you are in love with someone for. It's not what you think, though. The song then proceeded to the main idea of not being in love with someone, but only being in love with their potential. Realizing that you are only in love with someone's potential is probably the most heartbreaking, yet relieving feeling. I realized that I was only in love with your potential, not you. As bitter as it sounds, I was never in love with you and I never will be.

It's sad that I built you up for so long and all you did was disappoint me. I used to wish that you would try harder. I told myself that you'd get there one day, but you haven't and probably never will. Eventually, convincing myself of the inevitable has been the most exhausting experience of my life. I convinced myself that the more I tried, the more you would try. I thought that the more I loved you, the more you would love me. I was beyond wrong.

Honestly, the best thing you could have given me was distance. Because of all the time I spent alone, I had time to reflect on our relationship. I had time to wonder what it would be like to have someone who cared about me. I wondered what it would be like to have someone who wouldn't put their feelings above mine. I wondered what it would be like to have someone who complimented me instead of insulting me. Sure we had some great times and wonderful memories to reflect on but they were only great because I convinced myself that they were. They really weren't though. How could those memories be great when I couldn't share my adventure with my friends? You made me put my feelings aside because you didn't want anyone to ask questions, especially your family. I am a family person and I respect how you felt 100 percent but you took the whole "no posting pictures or tag me in anything on social media thing" to a whole different level. I thought for a while that I could do that and that it made sense. I respect what you wanted, but you didn't respect what I wanted. I wanted to make you a part of my life. I let you meet my family because I wanted you to feel welcome. Sadly, that was never reciprocated because that was not what you wanted. I never got the feeling of welcome from you. That was the most uncomfortable feeling I've ever had. I tried to make it work for so long but I just couldn't do it anymore. I wanted to love you. Honestly, I really did. But, how could I love someone who would never love me? You can't say that you did because when people love each other, they make it known to that person. You made it seem like a hassle to spend time with me.

I hope me leaving your life will open your eyes to realize that you can't treat the next girl like you did me. You need to learn that you have to respect what she wants. If it's not a mutual decision, discuss it. Do not make her feel guilty or incompetent for feeling the way she does. Never call her annoying because she changed her mind. She can change her mind if she wants to, just like I did. If you treat her like you treated me, she WILL change her mind, JUST LIKE I DID. Ultimately, she will realize that she, too, is not in love with you.

I wish you no harm. I wish you the best.I wish you a life of opportunity.

Most of all, I wish you happiness.


The girl who is in love with your potential.

Cover Image Credit: travel.india.com

Popular Right Now

I'm A Woman And You Can't Convince Me Breastfeeding In Public Is OK In 2019

Sorry, not sorry.


Lately, I have seen so many people going off on social media about how people shouldn't be upset with mothers breastfeeding in public. You know what? I disagree.

There's a huge difference between being modest while breastfeeding and just being straight up careless, trashy and disrespectful to those around you. Why don't you try popping out a boob without a baby attached to it and see how long it takes for you to get arrested for public indecency? Strange how that works, right?

So many people talking about it bring up the point of how we shouldn't "sexualize" breastfeeding and seeing a woman's breasts while doing so. Actually, all of these people are missing the point. It's not sexual, it's just purely immodest and disrespectful.

If you see a girl in a shirt cut too low, you call her a slut. If you see a celebrity post a nude photo, you call them immodest and a terrible role model. What makes you think that pulling out a breast in the middle of public is different, regardless of what you're doing with it?

If I'm eating in a restaurant, I would be disgusted if the person at the table next to me had their bare feet out while they were eating. It's just not appropriate. Neither is pulling out your breast for the entire general public to see.

Nobody asked you to put a blanket over your kid's head to feed them. Nobody asked you to go feed them in a dirty bathroom. But you don't need to basically be topless to feed your kid. Growing up, I watched my mom feed my younger siblings in public. She never shied away from it, but the way she did it was always tasteful and never drew attention. She would cover herself up while doing it. She would make sure that nothing inappropriate could be seen. She was lowkey about it.

Mindblowing, right? Wait, you can actually breastfeed in public and not have to show everyone what you're doing? What a revolutionary idea!

There is nothing wrong with feeding your baby. It's something you need to do, it's a part of life. But there is definitely something wrong with thinking it's fine to expose yourself to the entire world while doing it. Nobody wants to see it. Nobody cares if you're feeding your kid. Nobody cares if you're trying to make some sort of weird "feminist" statement by showing them your boobs.

Cover up. Be modest. Be mindful. Be respectful. Don't want to see my boobs? Good, I don't want to see yours either. Hard to believe, I know.

Related Content

Connect with a generation
of new voices.

We are students, thinkers, influencers, and communities sharing our ideas with the world. Join our platform to create and discover content that actually matters to you.

Learn more Start Creating

Here's What Happens When All Of Your Friends Have Babies

All of my friends back home are married with children. No, really, they are.


Over the past few months, three of my friends have shared their pregnancy news with me, and I couldn't be more thrilled. Baby news always stirs up a range of emotions for me. I'm excited and crying happy tears (no joke, I started to cry when my best friend told me and showed me her ultrasound).

Being "Auntie Meg" brings me such great joy. You see, I absolutely adore children, especially my friend's kiddos. They can easily brighten up my day with their giggles, love you, and their goodbye kisses & waves. I absolutely love getting to be "Auntie Meg"; it could potentially be my favorite role to fill.

I don't think I've ever loved human beings more than I love these babies. These are kiddos I would do almost anything for; they truly have my whole heart and I couldn't be more thankful for each and every one of them. I've loved getting to watch my friends grow into incredible parents.

I love getting to be one of the biggest cheerleaders for my friends and their kids. Listen, I can't wait for the day when they are older and are asking to come over more and spend time doing fun things with auntie Meg. I can't wait to watch them grow and I can't wait to be able to come alongside them and be a shoulder to cry on and one of the loudest voices cheering them on (Next to mom and dad, of course).

While there is just so much good about your friends growing up and having children of their own, if you are not careful, it can also fuel a person's self-doubt.

It can bring up questions like, "am I good enough?", "what is wrong with me?", "why am I not where they are at?" I would be lying if I said that I have never thought or felt these things, but here's the thing: you are good enough, there is absolutely nothing wrong with you, and their path is not your path; you will get there when you get there.

Those things are so important to remember in times when you begin to doubt yourself or your worth.

Believe me, you are good enough, there is nothing wrong with you, and that is not the path you need to be on at the moment. This is a great time for you to focus on you and the things you want out of life. What are your goals? What is on your bucket list? Just because you don't have the things your friends have, doesn't make your life any less fulfilled than theirs is. Your life is just as wonderful and fulfilling as theirs is, just in different ways.

Related Content

Facebook Comments