Stop Saying I'm Fine
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Health and Wellness

We Need To Stop Saying 'I'm fine'

Ignoring your feelings doesn't help you, or anyone around you, when you're upset or angry.

We Need To Stop Saying 'I'm fine'
Tessa Nunlist

A couple of weeks ago, I was hanging out with some close friends and we were all catching up. Everything was great and fun until one of them starting texting their S.O. They were supposed to go out to dinner, but her partner had something come up last minute and needed to cancel and reschedule for a different time. However, this was an important dinner for my friend because she wouldn't get to see her partner for another week and really wanted some quality time with them. Rather than expressing this to her partner, my friend just replied "K." to one of their texts and ignored them for the next several hours.

She continued to be mad at her partner for the next week until she saw them, thinking that they didn't value her. She failed to understand things from their point of view and also didn't express her thoughts or why she was upset. When they met up again, she blew up in their face and her partner was overly defensive. They ended up getting in a huge fight and hurt each other's feelings a lot. Does this story sound familiar?

In my experience, this is a normal occurrence for many people my age.

When we get sad or angry or upset with someone, we act like everything is okay and mask our true emotions. There are plenty of jokes and memes out there about the whole "k." or "I'm fine." text. On the flip side, there are other jokes about the paragraphs that are stereotypically sending their boyfriends when they are upset.

So what in the world are we supposed to do when we get laughed at for saying nothing and also saying everything?

For some people, it's easier to act like you're okay and super happy when that isn't how you're truly feeling. For others, they are extremely comfortable with expressing every single one of their emotions, even in times of extreme irrationality. However, explaining your feelings to your friends, partner, family, and other important people in your life is an essential way to keep relationships healthy and strong. Without proper communication, bitterness and resentment can make these connections very unhealthy. People may joke about the paragraph texts (and sure, 12 long texts in a row probably isn't the best choice), but letting your loved ones know why you're upset (especially if it's anger towards them) is crucial to maintaining healthy relationships.

Maybe you need to stop saying "I'm fine" everytime someone hurts your feelings.

Or maybe you should delete that Facebook post about how pissed you are that your friends couldn't hang out today. Talking it out with your friends and family is a much better use of your time than holding everything in and pretending that it's chill (even if it's really hard and sucks to admit you're upset). Personally, I have always struggled with admitting to someone that they upset me and I have a really bad habit of letting others walk all over me. So, before you decide to bottle it up, think CLEARLY about what you want to say (don't blurt out everything in a panicked rage!!!), and try communicating. Finding a good balance and discovering what ways of communication work best for you will help you and everyone around you when life doesn't go exactly as planned.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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