If you really knew me, you’d know that I swore I was a city girl until I actually lived somewhere else. You’d know that in my free time I add onto my extensive wedding board on Pinterest, even though I have a good while until I will get married. You’d know that I get aggravated at the stupidest things and very quickly. For example, if my phone acts up or if my well oiled plan gets messed up. You’d know that I am a hopeless romantic and watch romance movies like it's my job, and yes they make me cry. I will make you watch them too.
If you really knew me, you’d know that I think I have a sixth sense. You’d know how quickly I come to a decision on a person and how they are. You know I will continue to share my opinion until you realize my opinion on this person was right. You know that is not the only thing I will share my opinion on because I’m not afraid to be blunt, even when it’s not what you want to hear.
If you really knew me, you wouldn’t tell me I’m shy like everyone else does. You’d be begging me to keep my voice down or to take a breather before going onto my next sentence. You’d know what I’ve decided to do with my life, English teacher of course. But you’d also know that I think there are too many options and the many career choices in my head like writer, Youtuber, blogger, photographer, etc. You’d know that I like to be independent, that I will fight you to the death with my stubbornness, but like everyone else I just want to be loved and not forgotten.
Some day you will find someone who will slowly discover every little thing that makes you who you are. They will pay attention to the way you smile and the way you laugh. They will also pay attention to the way your eyebrows furrow when you get mad, and the face you make right before you begin to cry. Maybe just one person, maybe a few. A best friend, a lover, a combination of the two. It will scare the living hell out of you, yet it will be the best feeling in the world. One day you will find out who you are and what makes up all the things you do and why it is that way.
Though at times, it feels as though the world is caving in. Though sometimes it feels like everyone around you would be better without you. Even though sometimes your life may feel like it has nothing left to offer, that someone or something better will take your place. There will always be something out there worth living for.
With every door that closes, a window opens. With every end, comes a new beginning. Anything worth living for has to be fought for. Pain ends, your new beginning is just around the corner.
