What do C-U bars and Disney movies have in common? Most girls would rather spend their time on them than do anything productive. In fact, Disney and the bar scene are interchangeable: the nights we don’t feel like getting dolled up to get publicly intoxicated, we will often stay in to share a bottle of wine with our sisters and sing along to Frozen for the fiftieth time.
Interestingly enough, the leading ladies of Disney reflect our favorite drinking establishments in many ways. They make us laugh, cry, and give us false hope of real-life Prince Charmings. Allow me to be more specific.
Brother’s – Rapunzel
Brother’s is quite literally a tower; to enter, you must ascend a set of slippery, narrow, daunting steps. Many times you feel so trapped and suffocated you come to the edge of a midlife crisis. Alumni often flock to Brother’s to feel young again, much in the way Rapunzel’s hair generates youth. Just like Rapunzel eventually leaves her tower to find out who she truly is, many of us do not remain at Brother’s all night. We venture elsewhere to see what else the floating lights of Champaign have to offer.
Kam’s – Jasmine
Jasmine’s home city of Agraba is far cry from ritzy; it’s crowded, hot, and full of people you can’t particularly understand. This is Kam’s: a bar ostracized from the others in the middle of nowhere. Jasmine loves her city though, and allows herself to blend in with the riffraff just to feel accepted. The normally classy and put-together girls of UIUC do the same when we come to Kam’s. When we go there we don’t feel clean, but we feel like a genuine Illini. We feel at home.
Red Lion – Ariel
Ariel is one of the most messed up Disney princesses out there. I mean, the girl sold her soul for a chance with some guy she barely knew. She doesn’t know what’s good for her, and neither do the inhabitants of Red Lion. Sassy Ariel sacrifices the respect of her family and peers to do what she wants. Nobody tells neither Ariel nor TRL goers what to do; we do what we do because we're trying to find ourselves. Sure, our voices will be gone and someone will have to teach us how to walk by the end of the night, but at least we bagged the guy.
Firehaus & Cly’s – Elsa & Anna
These bars may be “sisters” but they are far from alike. First off, a thick wall separates the two. Haus, where drinks are often plucked from the unsuspecting hands of underagers, is much like Elsa. She follows the rules to keep a professional reputation. The younger and more naïve Anna can’t help but be immature. You would probably attach yourself to the first basketball player to call you pretty while drunk at Cly’s, right? That's just you channeling your inner Anna. Plus, any normal person would have to be intoxicated off an entire bottle of wine to willingly marry THOSE sideburns.
Of course, you could compare Murphy’s to Merida because of her Irish roots, or Joe’s to Megara because of her serious distrust of men (let’s be real, you’re crazy if you trust the strangers who lurk on Joe’s dance floor. For the love of God, don't take drinks from them).
What’s important is that all of these bars we love provide us with a happily ever after. That is, until the next day when you pull an Aurora and sleep through all of your classes, and scramble to find your one missing heel like Cinderella.