People imagine twins in many different ways, especially if they are identical. They believe that twins look alike so they must have the same personalities. They believe twins look alike so they must have the same interests. They believe that twins look alike so they must go through situations the same. They believe twins look alike so they must have the same grades... The list goes on.
I am an identical twin, and here's why people need to stop assuming we are two halves of one person.
Like all identical twins, we were the biggest shock to my parents. Two twin girls born 13 minutes apart, my sister being first and later followed by me. It was the moment we were born that we were joined at the hip (not literally which is a blessing). Best friends. Sisters. Identical twins.
Like many parents do with identical twins, they dress them the same. As we grew up we wore the same outfits but different colors. Had the same haircut but parted on opposite sides. In elementary school, we were put into the same sports. We started out with soccer, then went to softball, then went to tennis, then went swimming. For us, we felt like we were meant to stay the same.
It wasn't until we starting thinking individually where we started seeing ourselves as individuals. She continued to keep her hair short while I grew mine out. For me, this started around the time I was in middle school. I fell in love with music, and my sister was starting to fall out of it. She ventured off into visual arts rather than performing arts. For me that was fantastic. I can finally have something that isn't connected to my sister
It wasn't until high school where our differences had begun to excel rapidly. I took band class and she took an art class. I joined my marching band and made band friends. I started focusing on my writing and starting writing books. I began to branch out into the interests I had. She did the same, and we were finally feeling like individuals.
Many people have asked me throughout my life if I enjoy being an identical twin, and I always have mixed feelings about how to answer that question. I really enjoy living with my best friend. We were born to stick together and work as a team. However, I was born as an individual who on so many occasions was called by my sister's name instead of my name. When my sister had decided to grow out her hair she got so many people telling her "I can't tell you two apart anymore because now your hair length is the same." It felt disappointing. People focused on our physical features rather than our personal differences.
There's a lot of times where people view twins as the same people, and in other occasions as separate, but links us back to just being twins. I've been called "Twin one" or "Twin two." I've been called "Thing one" or "Thing two". I've been referred to as "The twin" and I've been nicknamed the "Good Twin" and the "Bad Twin". Though these can mean no harm, it is a label of being linked to that for life. I would like to be viewed more like myself than forever being linked to the word twin.
Don't get me wrong, I love my sister and am proud to call her my twin, but growing up that was all I felt I was seen as. The Twin. I felt like I was just not me. My own person.
I consider my sister and I mirror twins, though scientifically we are not. We are so opposite that our only traits are our physical traits and our love for food. Organization wise, college education wise, and hobbies are entirely different. We like different music tastes, which I feel is the most drastic difference between the two of use. If she is listening to country music I will go as far as I can go so I no longer can hear it.
However, I'm not saying we are so opposite that we don't get along. We talk just like any sisters do, and just as any other best friends do. We enjoy hanging out together and going shopping. We have the same friends, and if we don't all my friends enjoy her company and vice versa.
Overall, just keep in mind one thing. When you look at a set of twins never say this.
"Wow! You guys are twins! You guys must be exactly alike."
Otherwise, prepare for a lecture that will be more tiring than your 8 a.m. class on Monday.
