Hurting people, hurt people.

Hurting people, hurt people.

Just because somebody hurt your feelings, doesn't mean that they felt nothing.
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We have all experienced it: pain. We know pain like the dull edge of a knife: it is around us everyday. We are almost always suffering with some sort of pain, whether it is prevalent or not. When we feel pain, we have a desperate urge to unload it, to get rid of it somewhere else. Now, think of a time where you had been suffering. Think about the relief you felt lashing out on somebody, simply because you were suffering, and especially if they were the cause of your suffering. Why do we feel justified when we place our hurt on other people?

Because hurting people, hurt people.

We act thoughtlessly at times. We lash out, we say things we don’t mean, and we take the people we love down in our wake. Most of the time, we don’t mean what we say, but we say it anyways because of the relief that we experience when we say it. We don’t want to hurt each other, but we simply do not know how to let go of our own hurt without projecting it onto others.

A prevalent example of this is when you begin a relationship with somebody new. We are still learning the in’s and out’s of the other person, and it can be tough. Especially when you are piecing back together the remnants of the last person who loved them. When they lash out, be mindful that it is not always reflective of the kind of person they are, but perhaps how they have been treated before. Try to find the root of their suffering before casting judgement. Be patient, and trust the process. Recognize how you have both been hurt, and learn from it.

Along the same lines, are couples who have been together for any amount of time and will experience this too. They get into a vicious cycle of only recognizing the pain that their partner places on them, and not the pain that they cast back. In time, this creates a mutual wounding, and not being able to recognize this dynamic can be detrimental. Rather than taking each other in your wake, consider seeking solutions, rather than harboring resentment.

We are all on a journey, each one of us very different from our peers. Therefore, we will not always be able to understand somebody else's journey. However, even if we do not understand, we can still empathize. That means, when we can recognize that when people lash out at us, it is because they are hurting, not because of the type of person that they are. Take a moment to reflect, and ask somebody; “I can see you are hurting, how can I help you?”. If we all can exhibit kindness when we are faced with adversity, we will see a difference in how others respond.

So, the next time that somebody hurts you, don’t assume it is because of the kind of person they are. Look at the situation from a different point of view, and see that perhaps the person who has been hurting you is only doing so because they have been hurt before. When there are people you just cannot get along with, and they seem to be impossible to reach out to, remember that hurting people hurt people, and by taking ownership, and expressing kindness and love, we can stop the cycle.

Cover Image Credit: http://d1aeh7hxqn8xf9.cloudfront.net/wp-content/uploads/2014/10/how-jesus-crossed-all-boundaries-in-order-to-reach-a-single-hurting-person-940x629.jpg?7489a8

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An Open Letter To The Girl Trying To Get Healthy Again

"I see you eating whatever you want and not exercising" - Pants
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Dear girl trying to get back in shape,

I know it's hard. I know the hardest thing you may do all day is walk into the gym. I know how easy it is to want to give up and go eat Chicken McNuggets, but don't do it. I know it feels like you work so hard and get no where. I know how frustrating it is to see that person across the table from you eat a Big Mac every day while you eat your carrots and still be half of your size. I know that awful feeling where you don't want to go to the gym because you know how out of shape you are. Trust me, I know.

SEE ALSO: To The Girl Trying To Lose Weight In College


The important thing is you are doing something about it. I'm sure you get mad at yourself for letting your body get this out of shape, but life happens. You have made a huge accomplishment by not having a soda in over a month, and those small changes are huge. I understand how hard it is, I understand how frustrating it is to not see results and I understand why you want to give up. Being healthy and fit takes so much time. As much as I wish you could wake up the day after a good workout with the 6 pack of your dreams, that just isn't the reality. If being healthy was easy, everyone would do it, and it wouldn't feel so good when you got there.

Remember how last January your resolution was to get back in the gym and get healthy again? Think about how incredible you would look right now if you would have stuck with it. The great thing is that you can start any time, and you can prove yourself wrong.

Tired of starting over? Then don't give up.

You are only as strong as your mind. You will get there one day. Just be patient and keep working.

Nothing worth having comes easy. If you want abs more than anything, and one day you woke up with them, it wouldn't be nearly as satisfying as watching your body get stronger.

Mental toughness is half the battle. If you think you are strong, and believe you are strong, you will be strong. Soon, when you look back on the struggle and these hard days, you will be so thankful you didn't give up.

Don't forget that weight is just a number. What is really important is how you feel, and that you like how you look. But girl, shout out to you for working on loving your body, because that shit is hard.

To the girl trying to get healthy again, I am so proud of you. It won't be easy, it will take time. But keep working out, eating right, and just be patient. You will be amazed with what your body is capable of doing.

Cover Image Credit: Stock Snap

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How To Survive Your First Flu At ISU

Being away from your parents can be tough when you get sick, but here's a short how-to guide of what to do when you catch the flu.

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Going away to college can be tough, especially if you're used to being at home and having someone to take care of you when you get sick. Now I don't know about the rest of you but when I get sick I turn into a needy childish mess of a person who wants her mom to make her soup and bring her juice and medicine. But, being about a two-hour drive away from home I can no longer rely on my mom to take care of me. So, you would assume that my first option is to just lay in bed and sleep all day until I don't feel sick anymore. Unfortunately, I have tried that, and I can assure you that it's not a valid way to get better anytime soon. So, in this article, I am going to explain how you can get healthy quicker and skip fewer classes.

Step one to any sickness is staying hydrated, you should drink a lot of water, tea, and juice. The water helps flush toxins out of your body, the tea helps soothe your sore throat, and the juice provides vitamins and antioxidants. You will need all of these things in order to feel better as soon as possible.

Step two is to stay in bed and sleep, getting rest can help your body heal a lot quicker than you think. It's not a good thing to skip classes but if you can skip a class and use that time to rest and heal you won't have to skip as many classes in the future because of a sickness that lasts for multiple days or even weeks.

Step three is to remember to eat, when you feel achy and sore from being sick and laying in bed you will not want to go get food but it's important to remember to eat when you're sick especially things like hot soup and crackers. Even if you feel absolutely terrible you have to remember to eat, which might mean asking your roommate to bring you a to-go box and offering to repay the favor at a later time.

Step four is to take a nice hot shower, the steam from the hot water can help open up your sinuses which will relieve your runny or stuffy nose as well as relieving your sore throat.

Step five is remembering to email your professors and let them know that you are sick, this will help you to keep up in your classes and prevent your grades from dropping due to absence. Another helpful tip is to text a friend from your class to get a copy of the notes from class.

Hopefully, this short article will help you to handle your first serious sickness away from home, and if you're still feeling sick after trying all of these things make sure you schedule an appointment at the student health center located in the student health services building across the street from the Bone Student center.

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