If you’re at a college campus, chances are they’re all around you. You know what I’m talking about—those guys who are the “bros.” It’s pretty much the male equivalent to the basic white girl stereotype. When you know what you’re looking for, bros stand out easily from the crowd. They’re the guys who shout obscenities to campus tour groups or who wear sports jerseys in public, everyday places. A state university nowadays wouldn’t be complete without their presence on campus. Here are some common traits of bros just about anywhere. It’s your choice to hang out with them, date them, or despise them.
1. The snapback life.
Wearing a backwards hat is a must-have bro accessory, preferably with a sports team emblazoned on it. It’s like the crown for a king. It helps to easily distinguish who he is. Oh yeah, and he’s got a closet full of similar hats back in his room.
2. He’s a big fan of the beach bod workout.
A basic bro is often built in the upper body, or at least thinks he is. He’s an honorary member of the Tri Bi Delt workout fraternity—triceps, biceps, and deltoids. His overdeveloped upper body is like antlers on a buck. He does his best to show it off, preferably by wearing bro tanks.
3. Frat life.
This is an obvious one. Jimmy Tatro has especially been instrumental in further establishing this stereotype. It’s like a right of passage for an average bro. It really can define bro-dom for the rest of your life.
4. He most likely majors in finance, or in something related to business.
An overwhelming majority of people in business are white men, and your typical bro intends to keep it that way. He skips a fair amount of his business classes, but always manages to score in the top 25 percent of the class on exams. Investment banking or financial consulting just seem to come naturally for him, and he’s damn proud of it.
5. Sperry's.
This, like snapbacks, is another wardrobe essential. The boat shoe is a bro classic. Being on a boat makes you feel awesome. However, since you aren’t around water when in the middle of farmland, Sperry's are a great way to add some boat into a bro’s life.
6. He makes a habit of rating girls.
Rating how hot girls are is common practice for guys everywhere. The bro thoroughly enjoys doing this, especially when he’s at the bar with his boys. Particularly hot girls are known as “broads” to him, and he has a preference for blonde ones.
7. He has high end electronics, but no toilet paper.
Your basic bro will tell you all about the new “epic” stereo system he just got for his room or car, but when you're over at his place you have the hardest time finding toilet paper or other common household accessories. His room is a mess also. That just goes to show you what his priorities are.
8. He lives off of Chipotle and Muscle Milk.
I mean, what college aged guy doesn’t? Aside from being filling, this diet is sure to increase muscle mass, which any bro always would want.
9. Windex and Febreeze are his go-to cleaning supplies.
As long as everything in his room or apartment smells good enough, that should enough for cleaning, right?
Yes, like the basic white girl, there’s a wrath of judgment for basic guys as well. Love him or hate him, these are some of the common traits of the typical bro. Although he may be annoying or a douchebag at times, give the guy credit for trying to find his place in life. What guy wouldn't want to look good, have a hot girl, and enjoy life by having fun with his boys? When you do find yourself interacting with guys like this, enjoy what can about them. And who knows? Maybe beneath the layers of “bro-dom” you’ll find out that he’s a genuinely good guy seeking to be understood.
