How To Overcome Stress

I've Got 99 Problems And A Burnout Is Definitely One

Sometimes, you need to set everything down and think about yourself for a change.

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Work, class, study, maybe eat, maybe sleep. Repeat.

Sound familiar?

Such is the life of a college student. It seems my last semester has spared me nothing. Breathing has me feeling guilty at times, much less taking a few minutes for myself.

There are finances to worry about, meetings to schedule and attend, what to do about life after graduation, one project after another flying my way. It's the most stressful game of dodgeball I've ever played.

Each week consists of a million things, and I have most certainly forgotten to eat more than a few times. It seems the only moments of peace are in my car listening to some laid back music or at night when my cat finally gets to see me.

When life gets so hectic that you don't know up from down, or when your health starts declining, that's when you know you've surpassed your breaking point.

It's called the burnout.

You know those scenes in films when everything just whirls and is going, going, going nonstop until it just freezes? There comes a point when you need to do the same.

Freeze.

Sometimes you need to set everything down and think about yourself for a change. I don't mean this selfishly, either. If you aren't mentally healthy, how can you fully give back to the people you care about? How do you expect to live your life with purpose when you're completely drained?

Newsflash, you can't.

Whether it's allowing yourself a movie night alone or simply spending time with loved ones, you need to prioritize on keeping your stress low so you can focus on your goals.

Treat yourself! Go to bed early, spend time alone with your thoughts and God, watch some Netflix, and buy that chocolate cake you've been eyeing. Just relax. It's way too easy to forget who we are in the whirlwind of our lives.

The past few months, I've been so busy all the time that I don't know what to do with myself when I'm alone. If I'm honest, I feel a little lost and empty. There's that nagging voice in the back of my head telling me how inadequate I am for not getting everything done, and at times, the stress gets the better of me.

It's high time we learn how to silence that nagging voice and be content to just be. God knows we're dealing with enough clutter in our minds already.

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To The Dad Who Didn't Want Me, It's Mutual Now

Thank you for leaving me because I am happy.
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Thank you, for leaving me.

Thank you, for leaving me when I was little.

Thank you, for not putting me through the pain of watching you leave.

Thank you, for leaving me with the best mother a daughter could ask for.

I no longer resent you. I no longer feel anger towards you. I wondered for so long who I was. I thought that because I didn't know half of my blood that I was somehow missing something. I thought that who you were defined me. I was wrong. I am my own person. I am strong and capable and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

In my most vulnerable of times, I struggled with the fact that you didn't want me. You could have watched me grow into the person that I have become, but you didn't. You had a choice to be in my life. I thought that the fact that my own father didn't want me spoke to my own worth. I was wrong. I am so worthy. I am deserving, and you have nothing to do with that. So thank you for leaving me.

You have missed so much. From my first dance to my first day of college, and you'll continue to miss everything. You won't see me graduate, you won't walk me down the aisle, and you won't get to see me follow my dreams. You'll never get that back, but I don't care anymore. What I have been through, and the struggles that I have faced have brought me to where I am today, and I can't complain. I go to a beautiful school, I have the best of friends, I have an amazing family, and that's all I really need.

Whoever you are, I hope you read this. I hope you understand that you have missed out on one of the best opportunities in your life. I could've been your daughter. I could have been your little girl. Now I am neither, nor will I ever be.

So thank you for leaving me because I am happy. I understand my self-worth, and I understand that you don't define me. You have made me stronger. You have helped make me who I am without even knowing it.

So, thank you for leaving me.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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Part 1: Necessary Changes

One of my favorite movies is "Fried Green Tomatoes" with Kathy Bates. In the movie Bates' character Evelyn Couch says, "Someone helped put a mirror up in front of my face, and I didn't like what I saw one bit. And you know what I did? I changed." I know the feeling.

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I looked in the mirror over the weekend and didn't like what I saw.

The person I saw looking back at me is petty, selfish, manipulative, and unattractive. It wasn't that I hated what I saw, but I definitely didn't like what I saw either. It's a surreal feeling, looking at yourself through a critical lens, and it doesn't make you feel good in any way shape or form.

The image that I see of myself is not how I want others to perceive me. I want to be someone that people look at and see kindness, compassion, strength, and confidence.

I have enough general life experience to know that these types of changes aren't going to happen overnight, and not all of them will be physical; most of these will have to happen from the inside, from within myself.

When you find out you are all broken and damaged, it's hard to know where to start putting the pieces back together. I figured the best place to start would be the most literal: my actual insides; so, I decided to embark on a deep-cleansing journey to get all of the toxins out of my body, from the inside out.

I found this book on 10-day green smoothie detox stashed away in the dark corner of my bookshelf. The science behind it seems accurate and legitimate. By eliminating certain foods, your body is able to detox itself off of chemicals and foods that are slowing down your metabolism; the smoothies are specifically designed with combinations of foods that help restart your metabolism. Part of the detox process is getting rid of all dependencies on caffeine, alcohol, and sugar.

Every day you are given the recipe for a specific smoothie; you make the smoothie (about 40 ounces) and sip on it throughout the day whenever you get hungry. Every smoothie is a combination of leafy greens, water, fruit, and flax seeds. If you do happen to get hungry throughout the day, you are encouraged to eat raw nuts, hard boiled eggs, and a wide variety of crunchy green vegetables. There is also a detox tea that you have first thing in the morning, but other than that no other beverages are allowed except water.

I know that this is only the beginning of a very long, emotional, and draining journey. But I think I'm at the point in my life where I have to make these changes. I have to put my pieces together, I have to become a normal functioning adult, I have to find out who I am. I think that this is the perfect way to start.

For the next 10 days I am going to be documenting my experiences, how I'm feeling, what my emotions are doing, and any results that I see.

Stay tuned!

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