Relationships are scary. In order for them to work, we must be completely vulnerable and willing to face the parts of ourselves that we don't like, or haven't dealt with yet. I adore the quote, "You have to keep breaking your heart until it opens." Everyone faces some sort of anxiety when it comes to their relationship at some point. For some people, this anxiety won't go away. It gnaws at your brain every second of every day. If you're lucky enough, you'll find someone who will stick with you through it all and be patient with you. Here's some tips on how to help someone who is dealing with relationship anxiety.

1. Don't tell them to just "stop worrying."

Oh, how I wish it were that simple. When this is said to the person who is suffering from anxiety, it makes them feel guilty for not being able to just stop the thoughts in their head. Instead, ask them what evidence there is for them to be worrying. If you take a second and see if there's a real reason to be upset, a lot of times we realize that our thoughts were going down pessimist lane again, and then we can re-route.

2. Help them get to the root of the problem.

If you're constantly worrying and obsessing about every aspect of your relationship, you need to figure out what's truly going on. If you're always worried your partner is going to leave you, even though they haven't given you a reason to, ask yourself why. If you retreat and hold onto your anxiety and keep it from your partner, ask yourself why. If you assume and expect your partner to "mind read" and give you everything you need without properly communicating, ask yourself why you think this way. Nothing will get better until you get to the real problem.

3. Always keep your word.

This is very important to us who have constant anxiety. If you say you're going to do something, honor that. If you say you're going to call, call. Now I'm not saying you can never make a mistake. We all do. BUT, make sure you are loyal with what counts. If you know it makes your partner anxious if you don't contact them for a few hours, try to make it a point to shoot them a text saying what you're doing. If you say we can count on you, we want to be able to actually count on you. We need someone who is our rock in our scary and anxious minds.

I hope that these few tips can help open a door to some new conversations that will improve your relationship. Share in the comments below if you've ever dealt with relationship anxiety, and what you've done that has helped!