Learning To Love Yourself Before Another

Learning To Love Yourself Before Another

"The love that others give you is temporary, but self love is forever."


Self love is tough. For myself especially, I sought and still find myself seeking approval from others rather than myself. It's difficult not to, especially with social media, and a world that seemingly revolves around the concept of acceptance. Likes, followers, filters, and editing help us to curate this version of our lives, images that we paint in the hopes that others love or accept us. But relying and putting stock of our self worth into another can be devastating when they stop loving you.

Self love from within is often overlooked in our lives. From personal experience I felt that if a friend or boy loved me, then I must be doing something right. I must be pretty enough, smart enough, and worthy of this love. Yet, when those friendships or relationships ended I'd feel broken and ask myself what I did wrong. When in reality, a majority of the time I had done nothing at all. Realizing how others treat you is a reflection of them and not you causes you to have a completely different perspective on your current and future relationships. Your mindset switches from asking yourself what you did, to how the other person contributed, and you look at breakups in a different manner.

I've realized the importance of self love immensely throughout the aftermath of a breakup I've been going through. I never realized how much of my self worth and self love was based off of his love for me. This temporary love that he gave me made me feel amazing, but when it was gone, I felt like I lost myself. His daily compliments, promises, and assurances made me love myself and feel worthy of being loved. But his words were fleeting as was his love for me, and I failed to love me before. But I'm now learning how to love myself after.

If I had gone into that relationship with the mindset of loving me before him, I wouldn't have spiraled when he left me. If I had truly loved myself it wouldn't of taken the pain of our break up away, but I would've been able to move on sooner feeling secure in myself. It's so important to understand that the love that others give you is temporary, but self love is forever.

Just like traditional love between others, self love has its ups and downs. Starting this journey of self love has been extremely difficult. Yet, I've finally confronted so many issues that I've buried deep down and hidden trying to find acceptance from others. Self love is a lifelong battle that we as humans all face, but it's so important to understand that only YOU can determine how others make you feel, and YOU can determine how you choose to love yourself for you.

Ultimately life is too precious and fragile to waste time not loving you for the amazing individual you are. No one can take away your self love unless you let them. Look in the mirror today, and know that you're worthy, you're loved, and you define and own your self love.

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14 Fraternity Guy Gifts Ideas, Since He Already Has Enough Beer

Frat boys are a species of their own and here are some exciting gifts they will be ecstatic to receive!


What more do frat boys love than alcohol, partying, and just acting stupid? Here are some gifts that help fulfill all of those needs for the frat boy in your life!

1. Beer holster belt

Whats better than one beer? Six beers! This fashionable camouflage accessory can be used for tailgates, beach days, formals and everything in between.

Price: $8.49

2. Phone juul holder 

You know those cardholders everyone sticks on the back of their phones? Well, now a Juul holder for your phone is on the market! This will save your favorite frat boy from ever again losing his Juul!

Price: $10.98

3. Animal house poster 

This Animal House poster is a classic staple for any frat boy. This poster will compliment any frat house decor or lack thereof.

Price: $1.95

4. The American Fraternity book

Does the frat boy in your life need a good read for Thanksgiving or winter break? Look no farther, this will certainly keep his attention and give him a history lesson on American fraternity heritage and tradition.

Price: $28.46

5. Beer pong socks 

These snazzy socks featuring beer pong will be loved by any frat boy. As for the way to any frat boy's heart may, in fact, be beer pong.

Price: $12.00

6. Condom case

This condom carrying case will not only protect condoms from damage but also make frat boys more inclined to practice safe sex, which is a win-win situation!

Price: $9.99

7. Frat house candle

Ahhh yes, who does not like the smell of stale beer in a dark, musty frat house basement? Frat boys can make their apartment or bedroom back home smell like their favorite place with the help of this candle.

Price: $16.99

8. "Frat" sticker

Frat boys always need to make sure everyone around them knows just how "fratty" they are. This versatile stick can go on a laptop, car, water bottle, or practically anywhere their little hearts desire.

Price: $6.50

9. Natty Light t-shirt 

Even I will admit that this shirt is pretty cool. The frat boy in your life will wear this shirt at every possible moment, it is just that cool!

Price: $38.76-$41.11

10. Natty light fanny pack 

This fanny pack can absolutely be rocked by any frat boy. The built-in koozie adds a nice touch.

Price: $21.85

11. Bud Light Neon Beer Sign 

A neon beer sign will be the perfect addition to any frat boys bedroom.

Price: $79.99

12. Beer Opener

Although most frat boys' go to beers come in cans, this bottle opener will be useful for those special occasions when they buy nicer bottled beers.

Price: $7.99

13. Frat House Dr. Sign

Price: $13.99

Forget stealing random street signs, with this gift frat boys no longer have to do so.

14. Beer Lights 

Lights are an essential for any party and these will surely light up even the lamest parties.

Price: $17.19

Please note that prices are accurate and items in stock as of the time of publication. As an Amazon Associate, Odyssey may earn a portion of qualifying sales.

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The Urban Banyan Trees

A welcoming exotic tree we happened upon while enjoying downtown St. Petersburg, Florida.


In a park in downtown St. Petersburg, FL, were two trees from another world, trees that belonged in the jungles of India with monkeys swinging from their branches. My husband and I who had been passing the time as we waited to see a movie downtown, approached the sight with a sort of reverence.

Trunk of the Banyan Tree with carvingsCorrinne Brubaker

The tree had many different trunks and roots wound together. There were also long branches hanging down from the tree. They were hanging low enough we could touch them. My husband grabbed one and said, "look, they're roots."

Banyan Tree RootsCorrinne Brubaker

He was right. I thought they resembled roots. At the end of the vine-like branches were many strands that looked like roots. It turns out they were roots. The Banyan tree is an aerial plant. It begins growing in the air until the new roots can reach the ground and attach to the soil. The tree continues to grow and spread this way, creating its dense maze-like structure.

I wondered how old this plant was. By its size, it appeared ancient, but there was not just one trunk to reference its age like you can with other trees, even the central trunk was a combination of many smaller trunks intertwined.

Seeing this unique, magnificent tree was nothing short of an honor. An accidental honor that we had stumbled upon, a jungle tree thriving in the middle of a city. Tall sparkling hotels and condominiums stood as an odd backdrop for the tree, but the tree seemed proud to be there and call the city it's home.

The tree's sprawling ancient roots that rippled over the ground looked like a great place to sit. So, I sat for a moment on the smooth, sturdy surface. The tree was as welcoming as it looked.

Banyan TreeCorrinne Brubaker

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