TIPS FOR A GOOD INSTAGRAM

I’ve got 9,000+ followers on Instagram. I want to help you get at least one more. Maybe two if you're lucky.

STEP 1: You kind of have to travel a lot.

If you want to add at least one more follower, be prepared to invest thousands of dollars into plane tickets. Dublin, LA, London, Santa Barbara, Minneapolis, Naples, Boston, Copenhagen, Telluride, Rome, Vegas, Maui, and Pompeii are a few of the places I’ve Instagrammed. You’re going to have to go to at least that many different diverse cities if you want a good feed.

STEP 2: Throw some pictures of yourself on there.

You have to be a girl. Or if you’re a guy, your physical looks have to be very close to that of a "Bachelor" contestant.

STEP 3: Buy an expensive camera.

To have a good Instagram your camera must be good--because what’s a few thousand dollars on a camera when you have two more followers?! Priceless.

STEP 4: Do cool things.

You have to like, hike mountains and like, scuba dive in the ocean. Again, this may be physically draining but think about that extra follower (or two).

STEP 5: Filter it up.

Toss a filter on there. Yeah.

STEP 6: Gaze into the distance as often as you can--don't show your face

This is the most important step.

DISCLAIMER: Truthfully, I don’t want to help you because I want all of the followers for myself. Speaking of, follow me on Instagram (STEP 6 is shameless plugging).