Get Rid Of Someone If They Are Toxic In Your Life

Get Rid Of Someone If They Are Toxic In Your Life

"Sometimes you just got to let go."

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I met someone only a few months ago. We tried to be good friends but to be honest, his bad qualities definitely outweighed his good ones (if he had any). I just moved to a new area and he seemed like a nice fella. After hanging with him twice, which both honestly sucked, I just tried my best to avoid him. I would be courteous and hit him up once in a blue moon to check in even though I did not want to. I did not want to speak to him at all.

I then asked myself, "why do I care to reach out to him if he does nothing for me as a friend?" He then texted me something very immature which then led me to tell the dude to please stop talking to me as I simply told him we are not meant to be friends. He laughed which then reassured that I totally made the right choice.

I felt bad at first exiting the so-called short friendship we had. But then I realized, he not only made me feel like shit but added no value to my life. As harsh as that sounds, it was the truth.

I always felt guilty ending a friendship with others, which I do not do a lot. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt. I have had people, well too many people ghost me and end friendships out of the blue. It made me feel crappy and ask myself "how can someone do something so cold?" Then I realized that if a person just does not have value to you in your life, get rid of them. I guess that is what people did to me.

I now understand however that I am allowed to do that to people without feeling guilty. This guy I got rid of was a great choice of mine and I truly feel no guilt. I wish I had done this to others in the past when needed to instead of staying stuck in relationships that did not suit me.

When you are in a relationship with someone that you think is not benefiting you, it may be time to reevaluate the friendship. I am not saying drop all your friends who have made you feel bad a few times. Were all humans and make mistakes. I am saying if a friend of yours constantly adds more bad to your life than good, puts you down, makes you feel shitty, etc. That is pure toxic and is not needed.

It does not only have to be friends but boyfriends, girlfriends, family members, you name it!

It sucks ending relationships and having people end them with you. Sometimes I do believe however that certain relationships just are not meant to last and the ones that matter will truthfully stay in your life.

There is an interesting article about how and why you should remove toxic people from your life, with one of them being you can't expect people to change.

You can't always expect people to change to better your life. What you can do though is figure out if they are worth it.

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20 'Thank Yous' My Best Friends Need To Hear BEFORE The Semester Ends

Because I don't thank you enough.

Cassie
Cassie
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When I decided to graduate a year early, I never thought about how hard it would be to say goodbye. The best part of my three-year journey at Florida State was the friends that I had made. The friends you meet in college are the friends you will never forget. Although in two weeks we will be miles apart, this is not the end of us-- this is a different type of forever. At this point, all I can say is thank you for making my time here unforgettable. Thank you:

1. For buying me Ice Cream when I had a bad day.

2. For pushing me out of my comfort zone. 

3. For teaching me the right way to do Happy Hour. 

4. For complimenting me when I wore that tight dress.

5. For forcing me to go to the library with you.

6. For *trying* to make me go to the gym.

7. For giving me great advice that you know I won't follow. 

8. For letting me borrow your new shirt even though you haven't even worn it yet.

9. For forgiving me when I get a little sassy.

10. For telling me I can do better. 

11. For reading my shitty articles. 

12. For ignoring my absolutely terrible singing. 

13. For laughing at my jokes. 

14. For roasting me in the group chat. 

15. For driving me to class when I was too lazy to find parking. 

16. For picking me up from class when I was too lazy to walk back home.

17. For lending me money because I really REALLY needed that extra guacamole.

18. For tolerating my annoying self after your stressful day.

19. For staying up late because I didn't want to watch the scary movie alone.

20. For being the best friends I ever had.

Cassie
Cassie

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To The Boy I Fell In Then Out Of Love With, A Final Message

I want people to understand it is VERY possible to fall in love with the wrong person.

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It wasn't right.

And as much as it pains me to come to this realization, it's also liberating.

I fell in love with you. But I fell in love with the wrong person.

I'm sorry for trying to change you. I'm sorry for trying to reconstruct who you are as a person. But, because I now see these red flags and understand the emotional exhaustion we caused each other, I know now it can't work. I had too much hope in the potential — the what could have been. The impossible. I envisioned the ideal, picturesque relationship with you. I thought that if you changed the things I wanted you to change, everything would be fine. I couldn't force you to do that, though. I couldn't keep forcing anything.

There are so many beautiful things about you I will cherish forever.

I see so much good in you that a lot of people couldn't. Our relationship was special and strong in certain ways. You were the first person I ever really fell for. And for that, I will hold a place in my heart for you that will never, ever leave, no matter who comes into my life.

You are irreplaceable.

That being said, it's important to also note where things went wrong. Where things just couldn't be fixed. Where tireless effort just wasn't worth it anymore.

Love isn't supposed to be easy, but it also shouldn't be nearly as difficult as we made it out to be. I'm sorry we couldn't love each other. Maybe in another time or another life, it will be different. But it won't work now.

To the boy I fell in love with, I loved you, but I can't be with you.

I want people to understand it is VERY possible to fall in love with the wrong person. Red flags can pervade, but you will push them under the table because you don't want them to be true. I want people to realize you can still find so much good in a person and fall for a person for so many different reasons, but they STILL aren't right for you. All of this is real and valid and NEEDS to get addressed. If not, you will find yourself in an endless, toxic cycle of hurt and heartache.

Below, I've attached an article written by Kristine Fellizar entitled "20-Easy-To-Miss Signs You're In Love With The Wrong Person." I would make a list myself, but I feel like her list explicates this topic well, and I related to many of the ideas embedded in her piece.

Don't look at your past relationships as a mistake. Learn and grow from one another. Find that person that shouldn't have to change anything for you. You deserve a love that is wholesome and worth it.

You can be happy. Love someone for them. No more molding. No more wishful thinking. Just loving.

Easy, simple loving.

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