What is it that they say "find your tribe and love them hard"? As cliche as it may be, it couldn't be more fitting. I've always struggled with friendships for as long as I can remember. I was also a person who hid my feelings of loneliness throughout middle school and high school quite well.
You see, I was the person who, although I am quite introverted, got along with just about everybody. I definitely wasn't (and I'm still not) a social butterfly but I can strike up a conversation with just about anybody. And until college, I had not had to make new friends since fourth grade. And that is hard, really hard.
Yes, I still had my high school friends, but they were eighty miles away and living a very different life than the one I was. As sad as it sounds, I feel that my high school friends and I drew close out of convenience and the bliss of familiarity.
We had all known each other through the painfully awkward preteen years and through just plain painful experiences in high school. That is not to say that my friendship with those people is invalid or in some way less than; it is just different.
It's not raw and real and honest like the ones that I now have are. I think most people who move away from their hometowns can agree that friends from home are comfortable and familiar and it's good to catch up but college friends are just different.
College friends are new and exhilarating and now you are around people who have similar passions and care about what you care about. In college, you truly begin to find out who you are. No longer are you defined by your parents, fancy clothes, or how many people you have dated.
You get to decide your identity for the first time in your life. And, at least for me, it was so refreshing to be able to finally be the person that I had longed to be for as long as I can remember.
I never really felt that I had found "my people" and now, I do. This is all thanks to my school's chapter of Generation Action. I knew getting involved on campus was integral to having a successful transition but I really struggled with finding a place where I truly fit in.
I tried out another club but it just didn't click until I found the wonderful humans in Generation Action. And I truly believe that this is because these are women who truly care about issues in our world as I do.
These are the women who don't just sit around and let sexism, homophobia, and patriarchy exist, unchallenged. These are the women, to quote our co-president, Kayla, "who show up and show out". I need these type of people in my life because it enriches my soul.
I know that might sound a little cheesy to some of you but it truly is a unique and invaluable experience to have friends who you can 100% be yourself around.
And a place where you can not only be accepted, but embraced and celebrated for the beautiful soul that you are. A word of encouragement for those of you who are longing for community: be patient, resilient, and seek it out.
As an introvert, this is the area where I struggled. I expected to move away and just walk into an amazing community that would check all of the boxes that I was looking for.
But at the end of the day, you have to make a space for yourself at the table. And when you find the space that is just right for you, it won't be awkward or feel forced.
That's not to say that it won't be scary, usually, the best things are. But it will be like a breath of fresh air that you never knew you were gasping for.
