To All The Kids Out There Just Like Me, Trying Their Best To 'Figure It Out'

To All The Kids Out There Just Like Me, Trying Their Best To 'Figure It Out'

I understand that it may be scary not knowing what your exact purpose is. But every day is a new chance to align with that purpose.


For starters nobody knows what they are doing. No one has their entire life planned out, and if they do, I am impressed. Luckily we have our entire lives to figure it out. So before you start to go into a panic, remember to breathe and you're not alone.

Being a college student with all of the external pressures is challenging. We are told to clarify a major, get out into the world and experience, to get internships, and at the end of your four years; land a job. But it is not that simple.

About two years ago, we were in classrooms, now we are thrown into real life aimlessly running around looking for validation, support, and signs. I am here to say I understand you, I see you, and I feel for you.

It is difficult to have someone ask the question of, "What do you want to do with your life?". We are so quick to say I don't know. But that has a negative connotation to it, and I think that we should be conscious of the words we speak out into the universe. So the next time someone asks you that ambiguous question say, " I am figuring it out."

I am someone who has always stressed over the future. I know how I envision my life to be. I want to marry, have children, to connect with people on deep levels, and to wake up everyday with a grateful heart for the life I have chosen.

Anxiety gets the best of this vision sometimes and hijacks my moral compass. I now being a sophomore communications major in college; still feel like I have no clue what I want out of this experience.

Last year I would constantly stress over my end goal. Life is a vast, open opportunity and the thought of not having a clear end goal in sight, well it is frightening. This is something that I have personally been trying to work on, going with the flow and not forcing life. Just letting it be.

The important thing to know is how you want to impact the world and people around you. Start there and the rest will simply fall into place as it should. Think about what you want out of this life. Lets talk through it in steps.

Step 1; For me, I want to help those around me. Whether it is in small or large ways. I want to be a resource and a helping hand in times of need. Now that could lead me to a number of directions in life. Doctors, Therapists, and even Writers; they all have impact.

Step 2; Figure out where your strengths are and utilize them. I understand that I am not scientifically minded, I am more of an abstract thinker than reliant on concrete facts. I have more of a holistic mindset and approach to life.

Step 3; How would my work fit into my daily life. Do I want to pursue something that allows for me to travel? Personally, yes. I would love nothing more than to be exposed to the abundant cultures and perspectives that the world has to offer.

After these three steps, it is a comforting way to ease our minds. Because even though you do not know the exact direction you're headed in, you know the three goals of how you want to live.

It isn't hard to get trapped in the riptide of questioning, fighting against the currents of life. Instead, just ride the wave. Set reminders for yourself daily. For me I recently got the tattoo "Be Present", on my wrist.

This reminder is that I am young, living in the now. That I do not need to know exactly where I am going, but I should sure as hell enjoy every moment spent on this earth. Absorb information, expand my mind, try every day to be the best possible version of myself.

Your purpose falls into place as it should once you ride the wave of life. I have not found purpose yet but I am on the way! By expressing myself through the art of sharing and writing. Connecting to those through words and allowing for them to relate to me and feel like they are not alone. Perhaps this is my destiny and what the universe has set out as my purpose. Or maybe this is the transitional period to my purpose, I don't know!

Either way it is a learning experience, guiding me into my next phase of life. So the next time you are stressed, anxious, or simply frightened by not knowing, know this; it's okay to just be "figuring it out".

Popular Right Now

Sorry I'm A Size 00

But I'm not really sorry.

My whole life I’ve been thin—which is kind of an understatement. Every time I go to the doctor I get the same “you’re underweight” lecture that I’ve heard every year since I was able to form memories. I’ve never really felt insecure about my weight, I love being able to eat everything and not gain a single pound. Since my freshman year of high school I’ve probably only gained 8 pounds and I’m now a sophomore in college. Of course, in school, there were rumors that I was anorexic or bulimic, but everyone who knew me knew that was far from the truth. I’m now 19, 5’2, and I still have yet to break 100 pounds on the scale. It seems that there is a lot of skinny shaming going around and to me, one of the main contributors to that is the Dove Real Beauty campaign.

You’re probably wondering where I’m going with this because skinny girls get all the praise and other body types are neglected. That’s really not true, though. While loving other body types, you are tearing down skinny girls. Why is it okay to do that to skinny girls but not to other body types? Why is it okay to say “only dogs like bones” or say “every body type is beautiful” until you see a model's abs, or ribs, or thigh gap and then tear them down because they’re “unnaturally” skinny?

The point I’m trying to make is that, as a naturally skinny girl, I have never shamed anyone for their body type, yet I go every day and get at least two comments about my weight. I’m always the skinny girl, the toothpick, but I’m not Jessica. Yeah, I’m a size 00. Get over it. If you have an issue with my body and feel like my body is disgusting to you, don’t look at it. I know that I’m healthy and I don’t need your input when my body just naturally burns calories fast. I don’t have an eating disorder and never have. I am real beauty though, and I know that because I’m comfortable in my own skin. So maybe the real issue is that we as a society have been shoving certain body types down our daughters’ throats so they begin to romanticize models that have certain standards that they have to meet, who work hard for the bodies that they have, and are making a hell of a lot more money than most of the people discussing why they look emaciated while what they’re actually looking at is the photoshopped product.

I’m not going to apologize for being skinny when that is just how my body is, I can’t help it. So please, stop tearing my body down while trying to bring your body up. You can praise your body without shaming skinny girls. Shaming me for being thin does not make you better than the man that shamed your body, just as me shaming you for being curvy does not make me better than the man that shamed my body. As women, we need to love each other because we are the only ones who truly understand each other.

Cover Image Credit: Victoria's Secret Untouched

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Smile, Laugh, Cry...It's ok

Isn't it amazing that our body literally cannot contain the amount of joy we are feeling, so we laugh.


How great is it that you have someone in this world who has the ability to make you happy, excited, or even sad. How lucky are you that someone means so much to you that you are able to feel so deeply as to what their opinion of you means. Some may think it's a bad thing to let someone affect your emotions, but I think it means you're human. Emotions are the best gift that we were given. Isn't it amazing that our body literally cannot contain the amount of joy we are feeling, so we laugh. Or that we could be so hurt that tears run down our face.

Yeah, being sad isn't fun and at the time you want that feeling to go away (which it will) but just imagine what your life would be like if you couldn't feel sad? or you didn't have the ability to feel the amazing feeling of pure happiness. I would rather deal with the pain of hurting for a while than to have the option of never having to feel it again because it makes you a real person. It shows you what your morals are. These emotions help you figure out how you want to live your life. We feel emotions that we may not even realize. And sometimes you may never really know what's going on in that complicated mind of yours, but your body will literally force you to figure it out.

Also, the best thing about these emotions is they show you who really should be in your life. The more the actions of someone else affects you, shows how much they mean to you. All these emotions that you hate feeling like guilt, jealousy, hatred, grief, resent, these help you and they lead to great things such as being happy. Be thankful you have the ability to feel so much and so powerfully and be thankful that you have people in your life that can cause pure joy. Because one day if you woke up without these feelings, you'd want them back.

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