Self-care is boring. I know that better than anyone. But self-care can also be really difficult. It usually seems like it should be easy, but struggling with mental health issues can make simple daily tasks seem nearly impossible.
I struggle with a whole list of disorders, and on top of that, I've recently been trying to register for classes. I would always think to myself "Sending e-mails isn't difficult, and it really shouldn't be", but I always lacked the motivation to sit down and get it done. I would rather sleep. I would rather watch Netflix. That would be a better use of my time, right? Wrong.
Through therapy, I've learned that the best way to deal with large, seemingly impossible goals is to tackle them head-on. But what happens when you can't do that? What happens when the thought of getting out of bed is so overwhelming that it makes you go right back to sleep? Break it into manageable pieces. That, in itself, can seem daunting, but it's not as hard as it sounds.
Get a piece of paper and a pen.
You don't even have to leave your bed to do this exercise. Getting something to write with and to write on might be the hardest part.
Think "What can I accomplish that would make my life more manageable?". Sometimes you don't have a goal already set. That's completely fine. Let's just take my goals as an example. Write down what your large goal is in the center of the paper.
Now take a breath. This is an amazing step. Pat yourself on the back for even starting this process!
Next, think about what steps you need to take in order to accomplish your goal. For me, that meant sending e-mail after e-mail. Not fun. In that case, write "e-mail so-and-so" somewhere else on the paper, and draw a line to it. Write down each person that you need to e-mail somewhere on the page, and draw a line connecting it to the goal.
Breathe again. You got this.
Next, think about how you can break down the goals you've just come up with even further. Taking mine as an example, I would write "set up a meeting" under "e-mail the head of my program". Once you've done that for all your goals, see if you can break them down even further. You know your state of mind better than anyone else. If you're really feeling bad, "set up a meeting" can seem impossible.
You could break the e-mail down.
"Write introduction"
"Write body of e-mail"
"Write closing part"
Take a break. No, it doesn't seem like this was a very ground-breaking task, but it was a task. And you did it. Good for you! Understand how awesome it is that you even bothered to try. It's really awesome.
Now that you have your list, you can tackle your goal.
Do one thing every day. Whether that's to write a whole email or just to write an introduction, make sure you do it. It will be hard, but it will be worth it. The longer things are put off, the harder they become.
If you're feeling especially great one day, do two things! Then take a step back and bask in how great you've done. Give yourself permission to be proud. You deserve it.
Now get out there and take on the world!
