I'm the queen of bad timing.
In the past, there have been plenty of "would have been" relationships I may have had if the timing wasn't so awful, but I'm a girl who believes everything happens for a reason, so I'm thankful that they didn't work.
But I've never faced as bad of timing at the start of a relationship than I did with my boyfriend.
Sure, I had known him for years because he was a family friend, but I didn't really know him, just knew of him.
We started talking this past summer just before I went back to school two hours away in Columbus from where we live in our hometown outside of Cleveland.
The night I moved back to school he asked me to be his girlfriend.
Our one year anniversary will be the first day of my senior year at Ohio State.
It was pretty horrific timing.
A new relationship and we're immediately torn apart by two hours, people would have thought it was destined to fail.
But it didn't.
And you might be thinking, "You just said bad timing stops relationships because everything happens for a reason." You're right, I did just say that, but bad timing only stops relationships if you let it. We didn't.
So, here's how my relationship survived horrible timing and long distance:
1. Communication
This one is more specifically for long distance relationships, but communication is always going to be key even if you sleep next to each other every night.
Obviously, you have to communicate, and I don't just mean talk about your issues but just talk. Ask how his day was and let her tell you her worries. It may mean that you play phone tag sometimes because with long distance relationships you have two separate lives and you may not always be available to talk at the same time. Call each other before you go to sleep each night, even if that's the only time you talk all day because life gets busy and it might be.
Pro tip (that you've probably heard a thousand times): don't go to sleep angry at each other. If you're long distance that might mean staying on the phone twenty minutes longer to resolve the argument. If you're together it might mean rolling over and saying you're sorry to him/her. Don't let anger stew, it will only lead to more problems, trust me. In the same line of thought as that, don't hold onto things that bother you. If you have an issue just tell them (in a setting that's appropriate) so that you can resolve it. If he says something that bothers you at a party let it go, and that night when you get home tell him why it bothered you (DON'T DO IT AT THE PARTY).
2. Time/Work
It's gonna take a pretty large chunk of time to make it work. You'll have to put in work which requires your time to resolve issues, show your love, make them feel special and keep the relationship.
No relationship is always easy, but it's additionally hard being long distance. You have to be able to work through things together and time and money will be required if you want to see each other.
So much gas money has been spent so that we could see each other (even worse because my Jeep gets the worst gas mileage).
3. Loyalty
You have to be able to trust each other, obviously. If you don't trust you can't have a relationship. With long distance that's hard, I get it. I've been burned by long distance relationships before and that can make it hard to dive in and trust another long distance relationship, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't. Especially when your significant other never gives you any reason to not trust them!
4. Love
Bad timing and long distance can be beaten if you love the other person. You may not know you love them from the start, but you feel that potential, and when you do know you love them all of the time and efforts seems so small because there's no amount of work you wouldn't put in to be with them, everything becomes worth it.
So take it from me: against all odds and bad timing and distance, love can make it if you work for it.
