When you head off to college, normally you end up at different universities than many of your friends. People like to say that high school friendships have an "expiration date," which is graduation day, and in some cases, that is true. However, if you don't want your high school friendships to expire, here are some ways you can make sure they'll stay strong (and power through until you see them next).
1. Make an effort to talk to them at least a few times a week.
That may seem like a little or large amount of time, compared to how often you spoke to your friends during high school. Regardless, show your friends you're still dedicated to their friendship even after you're not forced to see them five days a week at school anymore. It doesn't always have to be a deep conversation either, small talk could work. Just make sure you keep in touch.
2. Skype or FaceTime.
While text and Facebook messages are important, Skype and FaceTime are essential too. It may not seem like a difference, but it is. You're able to see and hear the person and it'll almost feel like you're with them in person. I try to Skype or FaceTime my friends and family back home as often as we're all available, so they know that I'm willing to make time to talk to them and see them.
3. Ask them how they're doing.
A simple "How are you?" "How've you been?" "How's your week going?" can go a long way in a conversation. Many times, people use those questions as an opener to a conversation, but they can also be used to display endearment. Your friends will feel flattered that amongst your hectic college life, you're taking time out of your day to ask how they are or how they've been. It'll help show you care about your friends.
4. Support them if they need it.
College is a bumpy road, and it's even worse if you're struggling through it alone. I'm glad I had friends I've known from high school willing to listen to me rant and rave about my latest issue. In return, I try my best to be there for my friends at their time of need and accordingly provide them with advice (even though it's usually not that great). Let them know that they can always come to you if they have an issue and that you won't judge them for the choices they make.
5. Solve disagreements rationally.
Yes, disagreements are still bound to happen, even if you're miles apart. Whether it be over not agreeing on a time to Skype or take a phone call to taking forever to answer their message, make sure you stay rational. In person, you're able to dramatically walk away from the argument and then sit next to them in class the next day, but when you're apart and you don't respond to their messages, you'll be bound to drift apart slowly, but surely.
6. Make time for your friends.
This, too, is important. Your friends are bound to have different class and eating schedules as you when they go to different schools, but it's important that you all find a common time where you're free to shoot off a text or accept the Skype video call. It may be challenging and involve a lot of rescheduling, but try to get your work done early in the day, so you're not trudging through the homework you procrastinated while all your friends are enjoying themselves over Skype.
7. Talk about mutual interests.
Talking about interests you share with your friends is a great way to keep a conversation going if you feel that it's starting to die down, because who doesn't love to ramble about their favorite TV show? Tell your friends about what you thought about last week's episode, or the new song your favorite band leaked as a preview for their latest album. Not only does it ignite a conversation, but it also reminds you of why you're friends in the first place.
8. Update them about your life.
You don't have to give a play-by-play of every little thing you did throughout the day, but let them know about the clubs you're in, the fun activities you do on campus, or the basketball game you saw last weekend. Tell them the funny anecdote you overheard sitting in the dining hall, or the dramatic story your friend told you, or anything you think they'd enjoy to hear.
9. Discuss your feelings.
This could be a heart-to-heart if you wanted it to be, but it could also just be expressing your concerns for post-graduation, where you see yourself in five years, or even your nervousness for what the next semester holds. It may not be the same as the 3 A.M. talks you'd have if you were sleeping over at their house trying to stay awake, but it holds the same significance.
10. Tell them how much they mean to you.
I don't always say it too often, and sometimes, by saying it out of the blue, it holds a deeper meaning. It will have been unprecedented and you surprise your friend by telling them how glad you are to know them and have them in your life. They're guaranteed to appreciate it and likely remain in your life because people only want to be friends with people who know that they care about them too.
