Throughout my childhood and adolescence, I had little to no responsibilities or obligations. My parents never pushed me to go in any particular direction. I was never forced into a sport or an art, there was no grade threshold that I had to meet or face punishment, and my access to the internet was liberal, so I could freely explore what was out there. I have been free to discover what I want to do, who I want to be, and what I believe in.
For a time, this freedom led to some reclusive tendencies and depression. It was sudden. I remember being sick and staying out of school for a week. Then, when I got better, I was crying at the thought of returning to school with no idea why. The idea of school stressed me out and I had already been slacking off in my classes. I lacked the motivation to do anything or to want to do anything. I didn't even waste the day playing video games or watching movies because even that seemed tiresome. The only thing that I forced myself to do was draw and write. Eventually, I realized that my psyche required school and the school environment. I loved having tasks to complete and I missed my teachers dearly.
When I returned and got my head together, I was excited. I embraced my newly discovered passions and ran with them. Learning French was what particularly got me going. Something about taking this huge, abstract thing and slowly uncovering it and connecting it like a puzzle made me feel so invigorated. My French teacher really furthered my love for linguistics and helped me through my depressive state. Moreover, she helped me make the most of my adolescence in a different way and eased the transition into college. I owe her so much.
I even, somehow, was free from the influence of my parents when it came to politics and social issues. My parents were about as opposite on every issue you could think of, so I chose my own way. Now, along with my French major, I am a Political Science major and I am fascinated with another abstract puzzle that I desire to understand.
Somehow, the freedom to do what I wanted made me more open-minded and accepting. I find ideas that may seem crazy or taboo to most to be fine since they hurt no one. This goes beyond what even my parents may condone, but they accept me nevertheless. That is the important thing about my lax parents: they always accepted me through all of my crazy phases and emotional ruts. I have caused many problems for them, but they are still sticking with me. I cannot thank them enough for allowing me to become the weirdo that my conditions allowed and still loving that weirdo like a child.
Although I was free with the lack of responsibilities before, having them now is a huge change. I have a job at the library, I am a freshman in college, I am the EIC of the UVA-Wise branch of the Odyssey, and I am in a Dungeons & Dragons campaign. (D&D is a lot of responsibility and stress, I swear!) Having so much to do makes me feel like I have no life sometimes, especially when I want to spend time with friends and/or my boyfriend. However, it still remains true that I thrive in this sort of healthy stress and I still feel unfathomably bored during breaks.
All in all, while it would probably have done me some good to have had responsibilities before becoming an adult, I appreciate how the liberty that I had while growing up formed me into an open-minded weirdo who likes to think. I thank my parents for that and my teachers for helping me figure out how to direct myself.
