The 6 Different Types of Love

The 6 Different Types of Love

Which kind of lover are you?
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How many times have you heard people say, there is no real definition of love? Until recently, I thought that this was true! That love has no real definition or specific label. However, there are actually six different types of love styles out there that many of us are unaware of! These love styles range from the crazy and controlling that we all try to avoid, all the way to the unconditional love that we all hope to find one day. If you Google, Hendricks and Hendricks love scale, you can even find a simple self-assessment quiz that will help you find out which attributes and habits in your partner, equal which kinds of love! Learning about different love styles can help you understand bae a little bit better and figure out what a relationship means to them. And, you can even learn a thing or two about yourself along the way! And if you ask me, I think that’s pretty damn cool!

The six different types of love styles out there are actually quite simple to understand. So here we go!

Eros

The first type of love, is Eros Love. Eros Love is a love that is based mainly around the idea of beauty and sexuality. This is all well and good while the sex is great and you are in the honeymoon phase. But, after time has passed, and the butterflies are settled, you may begin to realize that you actually have no attraction towards your partner at all! And, with Eros lovers overlooking many other important qualities in their partner, like commitment levels, communication levels, views on social issues, and future relationship goals, they could be left in a dead end relationship that will hurt them in the end. It's not all doom and gloom, though, Eros lovers do fall deeply in love! They're hopeless romantics, their love is fantasy like, and they love with such great intensity. Who wouldn't want to experience that kind of feeling?

Ludus

The next type of love is Ludus! This Love circles around entertainment and excitement. While this seems like a good thing to many Ludus lovers; because they can pick and choose who they want to date and they can easily move on as soon as they get bored, it can be difficult for the person on the receiving end. Ludus lovers, or “players” do not take love seriously and therefore will just move on to someone new, without much of an explanation as to why the relationship has ended. And without eating the 550 gallons of ice cream that us emotional people eat after a breakup.

Storge

Storge Love is the next type of love on the list. Storge lovers will get along nice with each other because they share common interests and in many cases, they have already known each other for a relatively long time. While it would be nice to know your significant other and allow your relationship to grow and blossom into something much more, Storge Love sounds like more of a convenient companionship than a relationship if you ask me. Storge lovers lack passion, romance, and intense emotions, something more than just nice. Even sex is something that is not seen as a big deal or an important relationship factor.

Pragma

Next up; Pragma Love. These types of lovers think about their relationship logically. They analyze their future and decide if both partners involved can satisfy each other’s desires and needs. Their realistic expectations about their relationship and about marriage life, suggest that Pragma lovers should be the perfect couples. But, to every great love, there is a downside. Some people think that Pragma lovers only enter a relationship that will make life easier. Is this always the best road to take? To settle for someone who will simplify your life and allow no room for errors along the way? While it is most certainly a good idea to analyze whether you could purchase a house with someone, or start a family with them, Pragma loves should be cautious when thinking, is this the only reason I am staying with this person?

Maniac

Warning! Maniac Love! The Controlling one! Maniac love definitely has it's high points. Lovers can have a very intense, passionate bond between them, even losing sleep over the pure excitement of the relationship. Unfortunately, that is as far as the positives for Maniac Love go. Maniac Love can bring out some unfavorable emotions in couples; jealousy, worry, obsession. Sadly, Maniac Love can affect people so negatively that it can even lead to depression. This is not true love in my opinion. No love or relationship should lead you to the unfortunate circumstances of depression.

Agapic

Last but not least, there is Agapic Love. I think this one is my own personal favorite! Agapic lovers, show love to each other based on selflessness and compassion. Agapic lovers, tend to love someone unconditionally, they do not expect to get anything in return for their love. They do not expect to get any personal gain or reward for it. They have no hidden agendas. Agapic Love is described as a spiritual and philosophical type of love. The love is pure and comes straight from the heart. Just be cautious not to let anyone walk all over you!
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Want To Be A Better Boyfriend? Try These 5 Tricks

4. Listen to her.

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Some days, it seems like girlfriends are constantly asking for more, and while they may be annoying, there are a few simple ways to stop her nagging and win her praise.

1. Pay attention to her.

I promise you, she is dropping hints every day. These may sound like "Awh, look at all the pretty flowers" or "I haven't been to Boba House in so long!"

2. Plan dates. 

Text her while she is at school or work, and tell her to be ready when you get home or by a certain time. Give her an idea of how dressed up she should be, but don't tell her where you're going. Then, take her to her favorite restaurant, one she's mentioned lately, or to a new movie she'd been looking forward to!

3. Pick up small gifts for her.

This doesn't have to be anything expensive, but next time you're at the grocery store pick up her favorite candy, or a small flower bouquet. Just something little that will show her you were thinking of her when you weren't together.

4. Listen to her. 

Ask about her day, and when she tells you what Sarah did at work, ask her the next day or a few days later if things got better. Take interest in her life and remind her occasionally refer back to old topics to prove you do listen.

5. Get her involved in your interests.

It doesn't all have to be about her! Ask her to watch the game with you, or to go out with you to hang with your friends. She wants to be just as involved in your life as she wants you to be involved in hers!

At the end of the day, every relationship is different. Take this advice as vaguely as needed, and learn your partner and what they expect from you! Happy dating! :)

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You Can Never Go Back To Who You Were Before You Were Cheated On

A slideshow of what they did, what it must have looked like, begins to play on loop behind your eyes.

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Immediately, the thought of it becomes unbearable. It constricts the brain, depriving it of oxygenated happiness until slowly your joyful loving memories begin to blackout in your head. That's when it begins. Like the lights dimming in a theater, once all else fades, a slideshow of what they did, what it must have looked like, begins to play on loop behind your eyes. Every bite of the lower lip, every euphorically strained facial expression, every second of decadent ecstasy.

As other thoughts begin to seep back in and the lights go back up, every scene ignites like gunpowder in the back of your skull. It isn't just sadness anymore, it's pain that burns your mind and radiates through every nerve in your fragile body. The smoke clears and you can think about other things again, but the inferno has left the ashes imprinted on the inside of your eyelids. Every time you close your eyes, you see it all again.

Of course, you didn't actually see any of it. It's all just what your psyche, in the fragile state it's in, imagines it to have been like. You would think that helps, not actually having seen it, but it doesn't. It doesn't give you the certainty of fact, the assurance of exactly how it happened as observed. No, now since you're left to recreate the scenes in your mind, the ash impressions on your eyelids are exaggerated. You assume that every single thing that could have happened to make it worse, did. You fill in spaces unnecessarily, adding dreadful detail that may or may not be correct (though you are convinced it is) everywhere you can.

It's only a matter of time before you start examining and over-examining every single detail of both your relationship and what happened.

Were they willing to do this to you the whole time you were dating? Remember that day early on? When you drove through the October mist, windows down and music blaring as you both screamed the lyrics to your favorite songs through the cool damp night?

That first time you said those dreaded three words once the beat faded and you pulled up to the house just giggling and smiling at each other, then you kissed under the stars? Did that mean anything to them at all? Did they really love you back then? Do they love you now? They keep saying they do.

How could they love you? How could anyone? You're unlovable. You're not good enough, you will never be enough for them. That's why they did what they did. At least, that's what you keep telling yourself. It's what keeps ringing through your ears in the recreated tone of their voice. Even as the months pass or sometimes even years, the words will still reverberate off the prison cell bars of your skull.

You'll only be convinced of it more and more as time passes and you find yourself still single. Your confidence after what happened will be nothing more than the gum stuck to the bottom of their shoe, constantly getting crushed again and again by their full weight. You'll become convinced that nobody will ever love you again, that you have nothing to love, that nobody would ever conceivably want to be in a relationship with you ever again.

And then someone does. They're sweet, they're caring, and most importantly, they make you happy. Things progress just as they normally would, only with one difference. You still bare the scar of being cheated on. You'll find yourself, early on at least, questioning if this new person in your life really means what they say and if you can trust them. You'll start drawing comparisons between their words and actions and that of your former partner. You'll find it hard to trust again. You'll find it hard to love again.

Now, everything I've written so far may not be certain. Of course, this sort of thing varies from person to person and no one account of being cheated on is true to the experiences of everyone that has ever been cheated on. This next part though, this is the only part that I can say with near absolute certainty, will happen eventually for anyone who has gone through having a partner cheat on them:

This new person will prove your fears to be wrong. They will love you, and you will allow yourself to love them. They will be trustworthy, they will be respectful, and the last thing that they would ever want to do is hurt you. Their affection will cleanse the ash marks on the back of your eyelids and mute the hissing voice in your head. In due time, they will make the pain of your last heartbreak disappear, until one day it all just becomes like a distant nightmare to you. One that they have woken you up from.

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