Instead of actually opening a textbook for the biology class that I've been failing all semester, I choose to become emotionally invested in the fictional lives of characters on a Netflix series. This past week, I decided to waste my time by watching FOUR SEASONS OF "NEW GIRL" IN EIGHT DAYS. Yes, Mom and Dad, I did go to class. But I also stayed up until four in the morning to finish season two, and I hate myself every day for it (my GPA does as well).
The main reason I sold my soul to "New Girl" for a little over a week is because I saw so much of myself in Nick Miller. He's lazy, drinks a lot, and believes he's smarter than he actually is. I didn't use to be this way. I started college as a bright-eyed teacher's pet, full of hopes and dreams. But the system broke me, and all I can do is hope that maybe my winning smile will keep me out of my parent's basement for all of eternity. Here are some prime Nick Miller quotes that were meticulously chosen to help prove my point.
In high school I was able to put in the bare minimum effort and still get A's and B's in all my classes. Now, I can barely string together a coherent sentence in my classes, let alone understand calculus.
I used to like people. People were fun and good company. Now all I want to do is crawl in a hole and watch Netflix all day to avoid having to listen to the girl in the dining hall wondering aloud why Patrick invited Katie to the darty instead of her.
My mom says that I was messy before going away to school but I think my tolerance for disgust has reached a completely new level. I haven't washed my sheets since the first weekend of freshman year and I don't plan on that changing anytime soon. I stepped on a stain on my rug and they may have to cut off my foot now due to a bacterial infection.
I'm a simple girl who likes grilled cheeses and a nice boy. Although, since I can barely afford laundry detergent, let alone decent food, I'll just take the sandwich at this point.
College has turned me into such a fragile being that any major decision now sends me into a bathroom stall to cry to my mom about how I'll soon be dropping out of school to join the circus.
I don't accomplish much, but when I do you can bet that you'll be hearing about it (from me) for at least two months. My latest accomplishment, ironically enough, was the depressingly short amount of time it took me to finish what was available of "New Girl" on Netflix.
Nick Miller and I may not have our lives 100 percent in order, but we're loyal friends who are always there to give you advice after a bad breakup or jam along to Cotton Eye Joe.
