How A Child Of Divorced Parents Views Relationships Differently
Relationships

How A Child Of Divorced Parents Views Relationships Differently

Because I learned from My Parents' Mistakes as Well as My Own

9
Old Family Photos

Although I may have been too young to understand my parents divorce when it happened, growing up it changed how I viewed a lot of things. It changed how I viewed friendships, relationships and even just the way I observed people.

Like a lot of divorces, my parents' didn't end pretty. So I react to relationships differently because well.. I saw one fall apart before my eyes. And the cause of the marriage ending remained a mystery until I had gotten much older.

I tried to learn from their mistakes but I come to realize I act a little differently than those who were raised in a non-broken family. I view my relationships and the many aspects of it in a different light than most.

Communication is literally key.

One thing I remember the most about the times my parents were together is that they constantly fought. Neither of them would listen to the other because they were too worried about yelling over the other while my older brother and I would crawl up the stairs and hide.

Communication is important to me because I don't want to go through that. I don't like yelling. I don't the guessing game of what is the other person thinking. I would rather talk about a problem and try to solve it than just be angry and not work on anything.

I'm sorry if I question your intentions.

I may question you because the one relationship I should model after, I can't. I may question why you do certain things or why you say the things you do. And I may even question how much you actually care for me. But it's because I'm protecting myself.

My guard goes up with all kinds of people, whether they be friends or potentially something more. I don't want people in life that say they care but don't.

Honesty is everything.

Because honesty was apparently a hard concept that caused my parents to split, I take it more seriously than others.

I don't like being lied to, even little white lies and even those told with good intensions. All I ask is that you never lie to me because that hurts more than the truth.

I do except the worst out of a situation.

This isn't a sometimes, it's an always.

I expect the worst because that's what I've seen my entire life.

When you are young, you are taught marriage is a once in a life thing and it's magical. But that's never what I saw.

Excepting the worst never let me feel like I was let down though. Since I except the worst possible thing to happen I was never surprised when I did. But I was however, surprised when it didn't

Commitment is serious... Sometimes I'm not sure I'm ready for it.

Because my parents didn't stay together, I take commitment seriously because I would like someone who says they are only for me to mean that.

But at the same time it can be rather scary. I know I am scared of it. I'm scared because I want it to work out. I want to have someone who is actually committed to me like I am to them.

The other problem is I tried to make myself believe I wasn't ready for it and this make me uneasy jumping into a relationship.. But eventually I overcame that.

But I'm so willing to give second chances.

I'm told I'm too nice and yes, it does get me into trouble.

I know not everyone is perfect and I think that's where my big heart controls me more than I would like to admit. I give out second chances a lot more than I should because I usually get burned when I let someone back into my life.

I should learn from that mistake but I don't know if I ever will.

I will love you.

This one is probably the hardest for me to admit right away, but I know it'll come.

I do fall in love, sometimes easily. But if you can accept me for my flaws and my struggles, I know I'll love you one day.

I do have love to give even if it is hidden inside all of the walls I have built up to protect myself. You just have to care enough to break them down.

Loving me may not be the easiest thing to do but I can promise you it's worth it.

So I do take things more seriously than other but it's because I learned everything I shouldn't do before I learned what is good for me. I give too many second chances and will question you for a while, but I try my hardest. But all kinds of relationships are important to me even though it may not seem like it at first. I just learned how to love differently.

Report this Content
This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
Swoon

I Started Dating A Guy Before Quarantine, But Now We Rarely Speak Unless I Double-Text

"He's really nice and cute and I like being around him when we see each other, but he's awful at communication."

Each week Swoonie B will give her advice on anonymous topics submitted by readers. Want to Ask Swoonie B something related to dating and relationships? Fill out this form here — it's anonymous.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

This Is Exactly What You Should Eat Today In Quarantine, Based On Your Zodiac Sign

You've probably been eating it the past three months,

If we added up all the minutes of my life I've stood in front of the fridge or pantry mindlessly glazing over options, it would probably amount to several years longer than I'd care to admit.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

If You Don't Think People Are Legitimately Scared To Stay In Lockdown, Think Again

People are terrified of what could happen if states stay in lockdown too long.

Coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to be the topic of discussion for most U.S. residents. From federal reopening guidelines to individual state timelines, the country is all over the place. This sparks conversations within the news, social media, and in family homes about the consequences of reopening the country incorrectly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

If You Don't Think People Are Legitimately Scared To Reopen States, You're Not Looking Hard Enough

People are terrified of what could happen if states begin reopening too early.

Coronavirus (COVID-19) continues to be the topic of discussion for most U.S. residents. From federal reopening guidelines to individual state timelines, the country is all over the place. This sparks conversations within the news, social media, and in family homes about the consequences of reopening the country incorrectly.

Keep Reading... Show less
Health and Wellness

Feel A Lil' Better: Because You Need To Stretch It Out

Your weekly wellness boost from Odyssey.

No matter how good (or bad) you'd describe your health, one thing is for sure: a little boost is ALWAYS a good idea. Whether that's reading a new, motivating book, or listening to a song that speaks to your soul, there are plenty of resources to help your health thrive on any given day.

Flexibility is an important part of life. Yes, you need to be able to go with the flow and adjust when needed, but literal, physical flexibility is equally handy. Not only does increased flexibility keep you safe from injury each time you work out, but a good stretch session is incredibly soothing after a long day. Your body goes through a lot! It needs to cool down and get loose after all the activities you put it through.

Keep Reading... Show less
Lifestyle

5 Amazing Things That Happened To Me When I Took Just A Week Off From Social Media

I've taken one-week off social media, and here's what I learned.


You’ll think clearer.

Keep Reading... Show less
Facebook Comments