I'm a writer so naturally my go-to for expressing my feelings is words.

I'm also a self proclaimed history nerd notorious for obsessing about whatever interests me at any given point of time. Ask my family, ask my friends and they'll tell you they tease me about that fact on the regular. I love writing fiction based on whatever ideas I think would be cool to write about and a lot of those involve an alternate version of some historical event.

Recently, due to me starting to write a new book series that the idea had been bouncing about in my head for give or take three years (yet had lacked a catalyst for the motivation to write the idea) down my interest has shifted to none other than our great 16th President, Abraham Lincoln and his life (and the Civil War too by proxy, thanks Mr. Lincoln).

A few weeks ago I was talking to one of my close friends and when I told her about how my interest in Lincoln and new book were now my current object of my intense interest and she replied, "Every time I hear you get interested in something I know you well enough now to know somethng major in your life has happened." As I thought that through later, I realized it was so right. And I could pinpoint exactly what event in my life had lead me to into the escape of Mr. Lincoln's life: the recent death of my Grandaddy a few months ago.

Let me preface with this: my Grandaddy and I were very close and it seemed like we had been so my entire life. We loved history and books so naturally that filled our conversations and books or article clippings in the mail from him were a frequent surprise for me as he'd finish a book or newspaper article he liked and he'd send them my way.

So, needless to say, upon his death I was devastated. I'd be a liar if I was completely fine even months on. As a person who isn't the best with talking out my personal feelings I've learned that I can channel them well into words and stories and in fact in the weeks leading up to my Grandaddy's death I had just started to work on a new story about Abraham Lincoln that I had finally figured out how I wanted to play out after three years or so of imagining scenarios for the book in my head. I can't say much about the book's plot because I'll run the risk of spoiling the big revelation but I certainly can talk about how the research I've had to do has helped me through my recent personal struggles.

In school I grew up learning about Mr. Lincoln in history class and I was never one for American history (I fancied more European stuff), so as I began my research I honestly knew no more than the basics about this great President. As I ordered books and books and books about his life and the the struggle he had to lead America through I found myself finding a strange sense of comfort in the life of this humble self-educated man who rose to the highest office in our land as he faced tremendous professional and personal struggle throughout his life. Mr. Lincoln had courage, y'all.

One of my absolute favorites of his quotes is, "I am a slow walker, but I never walk back." I think this can speak to anyone who is struggling with whatever it is they are going through at any given moment in life and I've learned that, in my case for now at least, as we deal with the griefs life throws at us as we go along it might take us time to move forward but that's fine as long as we keep our mind, eyes, and feet in a forward moving direction.

Thank you, Mr. Lincoln, for saving this imperfect Union. But more importantly, thank you Mr. Lincoln for teaching me that as long as I think towards the future I can overcome anything even though ot might take a while to get there.