I remember when the first “Pitch Perfect” movie came out in 2012, aka my freshman year of high school. Freshman year was the peak of my One Direction phase, the single year I wore my retainer every day, and the time it was most acceptable to post selfies with the ‘duck face.’ Most importantly, however, freshman year was the year I started running.
I joined the cross country team in the fall and somehow made it through our seven-mile workouts with only one casualty (r.i.p. My pinky toenail). I absolutely fell in love with running, and Fat Amy’s funny one-liner, ‘I’m horizontal running!’ did not hit as close to home for me as it did for my friends who sat on the couch every weekend watching “Mean Girls” and eating Nutella.
Here are some reasons why you should also disagree with Fat Amy’s ‘horizontal running.’
1. ‘Runner’s high’ is something everyone should experience.
No, it’s not a myth. When you finish a run, your whole body relaxes and releases feel-good endorphins and you feel on top of the world. Even better, you can use this energy to power the rest of your day.
2. You can eat everything in your fridge and still be hungry.
I’d like to take this time to apologize to my mom for making her go to the grocery store every other day to supply the black hole in my stomach. If you’re a runner, expect to go through thousands of fruit snack packets, hundreds of peanut butter banana sandwiches, and gallons of chocolate milk per season.
3. Running is a great excuse to spend some time outside.
Really nothing is better than the feeling of trail running on a nice, sunny day.
4. You feel the difference in your muscles.
I’ll admit it, I definitely had to take the elevator after the first day of practice, but after three weeks I could easily double the stairs, and I probably would have run up them if it was socially acceptable to do so in high school.
5. It’s actually an amazing total body workout.
Running isn’t just for your legs. You’ll also notice some definition in your arms, abs, and even your mind.
6. If you run with other people, the bond you have with them is so strong.
My team and I spent countless hours together for six out of the seven days of the week. We endured tough practices, early mornings, and several injuries together. We depended on each other for encouragement as we finished a race whether we beat our personal record or fell a few seconds, or sometimes minutes, short.
7. Running relieves stress.
It often serves as a sort of meditation. You are able to sort your thoughts as you run, and it’s always nice to imagine yourself running away from your problems.
8. Your confidence will skyrocket.
You are strong. You are smart. You are hot. You’ll find this mantra repeating in your mind if you’ve been running for long enough.
9. Running gives you an impressive hobby.
Are you ever at a loss for words when people ask for a fun fact? Imagine the look on their faces when you tell them you've run six times a week every week for years, or that you’re training for a half or full marathon. Impressive.
10. You’ll sleep like a baby.
I never understood this expression because babies are awful sleepers, but you get the idea. There is no sleep medicine like getting some good miles in during the day.
11. Going on a run is always worth it.
No matter what I’m going through, whether I’m exhausted from school, work, or just life, running is a constant in my life. The wonderful feeling that I get from going on a run carries over into the rest of my day and, eventually, other parts of my life. It is always worth it.
So, sorry Fat Amy, I’m going to continue to set my alarm and strap on my shoes because, I gotta say, horizontal running is not for me.
