Has your heart been broken so many times that you've sworn to never open it up to anyone ever again? Have you been let down so many times that you won't dare trust another soul? Afraid of making another mistake or tried so many times that you're on the edge of giving up? Then this article is for you.

If you're anything like me, you may have wondered, what's the point? What's the point of friendship when people can take advantage? What's the point of relationships when people can be liars, cheaters and totally different from who you thought they were? What's the point of marriage when you love someone one day and the next you can find out they've been having an affair or, the next thing you know, they’re filing for a divorce?

So why do we love? Why do we put ourselves out there when there's such a risk that your heart will be broken? Why do guys take the risk of asking girls out when there's a chance he'll be shot down? Why do we tell people the intimate details of our lives when there's a chance they won't keep it a secret? All of us have been hurt by someone as a result of putting ourselves out there. We can either build up walls or keep trying, but why do we even bother? Well, because in the end, through the hard lessons, the heartbreaks, the failures and the disappointments, it's all worth it somehow. C.S. Lewis sums this up best in his book, "The Four Loves:"

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

If you do choose to lock up your heart it will be safe, but deep down we know that our souls don’t long for safety. They long for closeness, unconditional love and for someone to simply understand.

Throughout my life I've been taken advantage of and manipulated by so many "friends" and I tried being a friend to others with failure so much that I even gave up at times. I prayed since the sixth grade that God would send me a best friend, but as years went by and I found myself just trying to endure the loneliness of high school, I was frustrated when I tried to be nice and open up a little and people kept leaving me. No matter what I did, I just felt like I was lost in a sea of acquaintances. I had no one to open up to about what I was going through. No one to tell my story. No one who truly cared to understand, and I just kept everything bottled up inside. But I had also closed myself up tight and pushed others away from fear that I would be hurt over and over again. Afraid of rejection, I rejected the kindness and efforts of others. So I was definitely safe, but I had so many walls up no one could come in if they wanted to.

I was just myself as a kid, and then I had girls who I considered my friends tell me to stick out my arm so they could stab me with dull pencils, “because you’re black.”

In first grade I had a “friend” tell me she would call me on the phone that night, the first phone call I would ever get from a friend, so I stayed up late waiting and complained when my mom told me to go to bed because she wasn’t going to call.

In middle school when my friends left me alone in the corner of the gym at a dance to be taken away by other friends to dance with them, it kind of left events like that tainted in my mind and I never went to any high school dances because I had no friends to go with anyway.

And in high school I opened up just a little bit and thought I could be friends with someone, but the next thing I knew, we were walking past each other in the hallway as if we’d never met.

I always found myself alone regardless of my feeble efforts to talk to people, as I looked around at people laughing with their friends. I told others and even myself that I liked being alone, but that was all a lie. I probably hated being alone more than anything else. And then when I thought someone actually wanted to be my friend, it turned out they were only using me for a ride or taking advantage of my kindness. I was afraid of showing anyone too much of who I was because I figured no one liked the type of person I am, so why bother? They'll hate me anyway, be annoyed at my cheesy sense of humor, and couldn't care less about my opinions. So what did I do? I closed myself up to not only the people who would hurt me and take advantage, but I also closed myself up to the people who could be good friends.

But God is faithful and after going through that, I took the risk to open up more and true friends came along and I realized what a blessing they are. Now I’m in college and He blessed me with two best friends, quite a few good friends who genuinely care about me and now I can really say that I appreciate it. And on top of that, I feel like I can truly be myself.

For the first time in my life, I had people ask me what my story was and genuinely care about me. I've had people open up and tell me what they've told no one else because I decided to strive to be that person who will listen. I didn't give up on loving people. I found people who are OK with hearing my cheesy jokes, who laugh with me and relate to me about things from my faith to our memories of High School Musical.

Without the storm, we don't experience the closeness of friendships where you share your heart and you realize you're not alone. Through the risk of trust, you find healing in opening up about your past. Through the difficulties in relationships you learn to appreciate it when someone comes along who truly loves and cares about you. You can't appreciate the sunshine without going through the rain. Stepping forward will always have its difficulties because love is just so hard. But it's also so worth it. As the quote says, "’Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."

People will always let you down. You will always let others down. But that doesn't mean you shouldn't give it a try. I'm not going to lie to you and say that there will come a time when the heartbreak will stop; true love doesn't exist outside the reality of risk. Pain is inevitable, but don't let that stop you.