This has been a lesson that I have had to learn daily. That sounds weird, but the first time I wrote this wasn't the time that it "stuck." I have to be reminded of this every day. Recently, a dear friend of me bought me a key that reads "let go" and it serves as a daily reminder that I can't keep holding on to the past. So I hope this helps someone. It really helped me.

I’ve messed up. I’ve ruined relationships. I’ve put people into difficult positions because of my choices. I’ve abused grace.

I’ve turned from God to sin.

I won’t go into detail about my “deepest darkest sins” because that isn’t really important. My story isn’t defined by what I did then, it’s defined by the victory I have because of who I live for now.

In Jesus, there is renewal.

There is restoration.

There is redemption.

There is healing.

There is love.

There is new life.

There is grace.

There is mercy.

There is forgiveness…

“Forgiveness? For the things, I have done? How can there possibly be forgiveness for what I did? I don’t believe it. I can’t believe it. I won’t believe it.”

Those thoughts went through my head over and over again. I was so overwhelmed by guilt. I couldn’t forgive myself for the things that I did. I assumed that if I couldn’t forgive myself then God certainly couldn’t forgive me.

There is only one way that you will ever be able to see how God could possibly forgive you regardless of what you have done. Stand at the foot of the cross and look up. He died for you…

I think Sunday School ruined this one for us. We, academically, know exactly what Jesus did on each day of Passion Week and we know the eternal implications of that. We know that He died so we could be forgiven of sin. It has been drilled into our minds relentlessly. Stop and take a minute to think about what Jesus’ death really means. It’s not just a historical event. It’s not just a “get out of hell free” card. It’s not just an execution.

He died for you.

He died so that you can have forgiveness and live free of the guilt associated with sin.

He saw everything you would do from the beginning to the end of your life and He still chose the cross.

“but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”

(Romans 5:8, ESV)

That is the most liberating verse I have ever read. How can guilt still have a hold when it is written in the Word of God that Jesus died while we were still cursed sinners? Before the veil was torn, Christ died for you.

So stop letting guilt hold you back from a renewed and redeemed life with God.

Live free.

Let go.