During the past week the lyrics “when you try your best and you don’t succeed” from Coldplay’s song "Fix You" has been going around in my head. The words couldn’t be more relevant to my life right now.

We are in what I like to call the Season of Rejection. A season where high school students find out the fate of their college careers or who their prom date is going to be. Maybe they get into their first choice college, maybe they don’t. Maybe they go to the prom with the person they had hoped to attend the prom with, maybe they don’t. For college kids, it’s a season of applying for summer jobs and wondering “what if I don’t get my dream job?” A season of considering options and opportunities for the next school year. A season of “Did I get chosen to support my school through this or that club?”

I try to be a positive person who gives sound advice and when others hear bad news, I always respond with well-intended words like “God has a greater plan” or “You will end up where God wants you!” However, when it was my turn take the advice I had given out so many times, I found it was a bitter pill to swallow.

My faith is strong and I have no doubt God is within me; he is part of everything I do. But when I recently found out I didn’t get the summer job of my dreams, and everything in life seemed to be going downhill I found myself asking “where is God in this rejection I’m dealing with? Doesn’t God want me to have this job I was sure he was guiding me toward? Doesn’t God want me to help people? Why is nothing working out the way I planned?"

As I thought about these questions, various Bible verses swirled around in my mind, the Bible verses I had often used to console others when they were faced with rejection. Verses such as Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope” or the ever comforting and fulfilling verse from Proverbs 3:5-6, "Trust in the LORD with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make straight your paths.”

These Bible verses are rooted deep in me. The concept that God takes us where we are best needed is something I’ve always believed and yet, when it was applied to my life and my situation, I was confused. In my self-pity, confusion, and anger at being rejected for a summer job I was sure God wanted me to do, I forgot about the concept. So focused on my own wants and needs and what I thought God would want me to be doing, while also questioning why I was being punished by not getting what I wanted, I forgot that God’s plan is always bigger and better than the plans I have made for myself.

Nothing seems to be going my way these days and it feels like rejection is being thrown at me from all directions. So, I’ve decided that in this season of rejection, I’m giving up and placing myself firmly in God’s hand. I know my God will take me where I am supposed to be, and even though I had my ideal plans made, plans I thought would benefit me best, God has plans better than mine to raise me up in ways I never could have imagined. God is not punishing me and in giving up myself up to him, I must step back and let go of my hurt feelings, my anger, and my disappointment. I must surrender to what is, let go of what I had planned, and have faith in what will be.

One of my faith mentors once told me that because God is good; your life won’t turn out how you planned. For those also struggling in your own season of rejection I leave you with a prayer by Wendy Pope, found on the Proverbs 31 Ministries Facebook page:

“Lord, forgive me for the times I have focused more on my wants than your will. I know in my head that your will is perfect; please help me believe with my heart.”