January of my junior year in high school, I did something that at the time was just stupid and two years later has become so stupid it’s funny. I tried to run away. I say “tried” because my escapade lasted less than twenty-four hours, and I was in my mom’s car, using my mom’s money to buy food with my friends after we took the SAT the next morning (yeah, I wasn't gonna miss the SAT just because I was on the run). I’m pretty sure I even asked my mom for money to pay for an apartment because I was so mature and ready to live on my own. I also tried to take my dog with me because, ya know, priorities.
My friends were less than supportive and basically told me to go home and take a nap. I apparently am known for being pretty grumpy about everything when I'm tired, so the whole thing was likely a result of sleep deprivation.
I was honestly proud of myself at the time, but now it’s very obvious that I was just a pissed off, entitled, delusional seventeen-year-old girl (side note: if you are in an unsafe situation in your home and need to leave that does not mean you are entitled and delusional, but my family situation was nothing outside the norm so in my case I was just being a brat).
During high school, my mom and I did NOT get along. As I’m sure any high school girl can attest to, there was constant bickering. There were times when she would walk into my room and I felt like all the air had been sucked out. It was like we were biologically predisposed to fight ALL THE TIME.
It was a pretty normal conversation for me to have with my girl friends.
“You think your mom is crazy? My mom won’t even let me go out with (insert name of boy who had probably been to jail before).”
“You think that’s strict? My mom makes me come home before 2 am on school nights!”
OK, this is a little exaggerated, because sometimes our parents could be slightly overbearing, but for the most part, their rules were completely rational and we just wanted to do the opposite of whatever they told us. Going to college ages you about ten years apparently because now I relate to soccer moms more than other college students.
So as a former angsty teenage rebel, I 100% understand those moments when you just honestly don’t understand how your mom was ever your age because she is psychotic now. Well, she isn’t psychotic, she’s just watching a miniature version of herself growing up and it’s probably terrifying because she can predict every mistake you’re going to make.
One of my closest friends in high school was three years older than me, and whenever I would talk about my mom she would just kind of sigh and laugh. She fought with her mom a lot in high school just like everyone else, but she assured me that in a few years I would be rescinding my vehement promise that my mom would not be invited to my wedding.
Let me tell y’all, she was RIGHT. I call my mom so often that one time she reminded me that I don’t have to call her every day. I ask her how to wash certain types of clothes and what tax forms I need and how do I get rid of the stress eczema that is taking over my arm? I talk to my mom about boys and give vivid descriptions of my closest friends so she’ll know who I’m talking about when I recount our multiple adventures (in high school, I didn’t want her to even know the names of who I was associating with).
I ask her to send me pictures of my dogs on the daily and sometimes we Facetime just to recount the most minute details of our day. Granted, she lives in Texas and I go to school in New York so I see her a lot less than some of my friends who go to school three hours away from our hometown. But it is a universal rule that the more you fought with your mom in high school, the more you will miss her in college.
So when your mom asks if you want to get breakfast or go to a yoga class together or spend a Saturday night in for a girl’s night, DO IT. As fun and amazing as college is, the time you have now with your mom can never be replicated and you will never able to rely on her the way you do now.
Most importantly, when your mom says that that certain someone you’ve been hanging around with is bad news, she is right. 100%. Drop them. Run away. And always always always thank your mom for watching out for you.
